365 Journey....plus some

Favorite Photo

2012-02-08T13:50:00.000-08:00

I just wasn't sure I had added this, my very favorite photo, to my blog.. Love this. And right now I am anxiously awaiting a canvas print of this very image! Can't wait to see it IRL! The last print I ordered blew me away.. I can't wait to add this one next to it!

2012-02-07T11:24:00.000-08:00

When I made my resolutions for this year I was absolutely serious about each one. I considered them thoughtfully as I put fingers to keypad to typed them out. They are resolutions that I believe will make my life better. They are resolutions that challenge me, but not too much.

My first resolution is one that I started on immediately. It's going to be made up of ongoing segments, never fully completed.. Just an ongoing project that I can work on as little or much as I like, do double one month and none the next...and still be happy with the outcome. I decided that since my number one resolution was to be in touch with family better I would start sending homemade postcards. That way I could add some fun to the process and a piece of myself. One of the funnest parts that I feel is also a piece of myself is that I will be using pictures that I snapped and edited myself!

I plan to send out a batch at least once a month, not always to the same group of family members. I want them to receive a little happy mail in the midst of all the mundane bills and ads. I want to brighten a day, bring a smile and to hopefully let them get to know me, the reserved one, a bit better.

In the above picture the first batch of "postcards" can be seen. Of the many pictures that I snapped in January I chose a neutral one so as not to send pictures of my loved ones openly through the mail.

Boy Survival and adorable sockies

2012-02-04T18:15:00.000-08:00

Had a great day today, even if I had to wake by 7 on a Saturday. And even if I had to take an hour and a half ride. And even though I missed the exits for Kelli's house twice on my way!

Today Kelli, Cici and I took off for our great friend Junnie's baby shower. Amazingly I made it through the ride there with two engineers talking about PE tests, waste water management, structure... ;)

The event went well. I always get anxious about giving gifts because I'm afraid they won't be up to par but I think my gift was well-received. :)

I decided almost last minute to throw together a "Boy Survival Kit" for the new baby.. Crib sheets, pacis, socks and a onesie just didn't seem to cut it--even if the onesie had a sewn faux tie and the socks were the adorable ones that look like little sneakers...love those! I filled the "Boy Survival Kit" with band-aids, wipes, tissues, and a couple of cars and dinos + an explanation for each item. :)

!
Here's the little onesie that I sewed a faux tie to. Love these little shirts! If I ever have another little boy (ahem, Brad!) I will have his drawer filled with these in every color and pattern!

And here's the card that I put together, which included a novel inside.. I really do have anxiety about gift-giving so I wrote my reasons for each item, from extra crib sheets for those middle-of-the-night-when-you're-groggy-as-can-be diaper blow-outs to more paci's because you can never have enough b/c they disappear into thin air to a faux-tie shirt and adorable sockies just because they're adorable!

Congrats to Jun and Greg! I wish them lots of love and joy!

Be brave.

2012-01-29T09:25:00.000-08:00

I am an overthinker. I think I do it out of fear. I think I do it out of precaution. As can be seen, "I think" too much.

When it comes to doing I am tentative. I do things one of three ways... I keep over-thinking and gingerly apply one little step at a time, questioning each one even after I've finished it.. Or I run right through the motions because it's a process that I've done so many times that I know I have it "perfected" and I no longer worry.. Or I finally get a jolt of being so weighed down by my inhibition that I throw myself forward into whatever I'm doing with hardly a thought.

This is a lot of ramble just to say that today I did something that I've been throwing around in my head for a while. Today I invited an old acquaintance to join me for a race in July. This acquaintance was a childhood competitor. We got along because we challenged each other. Basically it was academically, but now I feel inviting her to race with me could help me physically. I think involving her could force me to try more, work harder, get stronger.

I smile because I know that if she accepts the invitation it will do it's job.. I will run harder and longer. I will know that I have to work hard to keep up because I know that she will be working hard to be ahead! I am accepting the challenge because even if I end up as the weaker of the two of us I will also end up stronger than I was before the challenge! I will have tried, I will have competed and conquered myself.

When I messaged her an invite I had a quote that ran through my head. If it weren't for the quote I don't think I would have had the courage to go through with it:

"Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference." -H. Jackson Brown

Enjoy this time

2012-01-27T20:28:00.001-08:00

He will only be 4 for a short while. He will only play on the floor with his cars for so long. Before I know it he will be playing in the garage with life-size ones. He and Brad will be bonding and arguing over them. He will be thinking that we're silly and don't know anything. He will be embarrassed by us and think we're so dumb that it's a wonder we've survived as long as we have (words straight out of Brad's dads mouth.. I think he would certainly know, considering he's been through that with the older version of Riley... ;)

Why am I getting into that? I should just be enjoying this time as it is right now. I should be relishing the fact that we just watched "Mars Needs Moms" and he kept repeating, "Mommy, I never want that to happen to you." And as a side-note, I might mention that Meli agreed and cried a little through the movie... Meli's tenderhearted like that.

It's not an isolated incident that he told me, in his round-about way, that he loves and needs me. He still tells me he loves me out of nowhere. He still wants to give me "squeezy hugs" and sit on my lap. He looks at me fondly and tells me that he never wants me to leave. There's quite the bond there. But kisses are still out of the question. Now he's even banned me from kissing him on the cheek when I drop him off at school.. So I've settled for a little head bump.

I don't know what I'm going to do in 5-10 years when the rocky years come. I don't know how I'm going to relate to him.. I guess I'll just enjoy the time I have right now and try to hold on to the advice of an older mom friend:

(Paraphrased) Talk to them often when they're young and continue to talk to them as they get older and they will be more likely to continue talking with you and coming to you.

I will do that and I will pray that the road ahead has as few bumps as possible.

Student of the Month

2012-01-21T17:53:00.000-08:00

I am very proud to say that my little Miss Amelia was named a Student for the Month for December!

I'm not gonna lie--I've been hoping for the letter for a while. Just about every parent wants to see their child succeed, to see their child get their opportunity to be highlighted. I would suppose it makes us feel as though we've been doing something 'right'.

On the Friday after the Students of the Month are named, they are awarded their star and get to stand in front of the school at "Lift-Off", their school-wide meeting. Riley and I made sure to stick around to see our Sweet Meli get the privilege of being noticed. She was excited for us to be there, but I could see the disappointment when I didn't have my camera to take pictures..

What kind of an overzealously, picture-loving mama doesn't have her camera on a big day like that?! Me. :(

Well, at least I have the above-picture, right? And a little blog post to document the occasion.. :)

SMASH!

2012-01-15T17:32:00.000-08:00

From the moment I saw SMASHbooks I knew they were so "me". I wanted one. Had to have one. So I looked around like crazy. I couldn't have just any, though, I had to have my favorite color, orange. When I finally got my hands on my book, I just held it. I didn't know where to begin. I just knew that I wanted to fill it with wonderfully random stuff!

I intended to find clippings and tickets and receipts and ads and menus and all sorts of little treasures that I wanted to keep but had no home for.. I didn't plan little tuck-away parts before I started, but thought those random bags and envelopes just hanging around my craft space might work awfully well in there...

I also didn't intend to assign pages to specific subjects but ended up going that route on a few, like a spread about Meli's recent birthday party, plus pages about both kids recently starting school...

The first page that I worked on in my book was actually just an original page that I altered a little... While showing my new toy to the kids I read what was written throughout the book. When I got to my favorite page in the book, Riley tried to repeat what I had read but couldn't remember it all. He ended up stating, "You are some great stuff!" I loved that and had to change the page and tell the little story.

In the end I decided to mark out "END HERE" because I definitely see more SMASHbooks in my future! And though messy and random is my way, I'm thinking of following some of Elizabeth Kartchner's approach on my next one.. Try to make it a little neater and prettier the next go around..

Today: Meli Edition

2012-01-14T13:27:00.000-08:00

Today I am very proud of my little Meli...she was made a Student of the Month this week!

Today Meli decided to go on a safari adventure in our backyard. She wrote "observations" of a tiger and took a picture (drew a picture) of a lion.

Today she sang and danced around me as I cleaned out the dining room, a.k.a playroom.

Today I messed up her room. The constant attempts to get her to keep it clean were going nowhere, so I tried a new approach.. :/

Today I let her check the boxes as I completed my tasks. I'm thinking it's time for her to have her own chore charts to check boxes from.

Today we are going to order pizza for dinner and rent a movie..

Today Dylan is coming for a sleepover. Meli has been waiting all week for this.

You Can't

2011-12-31T09:00:00.000-08:00

Serious post here that I hope I someday look back on in disbelief...

I am trying to figure out what you do when you have a toxic relationship that is "close" to you. A relationship that is not easy to void. When it is a God-given relationship, not a chosen one.

I have walked away from plenty of toxic relationships. I make no bones about making sure that I am at peace and am not brought down by others and their personal issues. I have had to dig myself out of depression, I have had to admit to myself that I was my biggest problem and that I was being toxic to everyone around me...

But you can't say that to another person. You especially can't say that to an overly-dramatic person. You can't tell them that they are toxic. They will spew. They will hate. They will throw every piece of anger they have at you.

You can't live their life. You can't determine their actions. You can't reason with them if they are being unreasonable.

But, I know that you can determine your own actions. You can minimize your interaction. You can walk away. You can refuse to deal with them.

That's what I have always done. That is apparently what I will always have to do. And though it is tiring, I will continue to do that.

I resolve..

2011-12-29T10:52:00.001-08:00

2011 is coming to a close. Here comes 2012. I have my resolutions ready to go. Some are the same old ones you hear every year, some are a bit broad, some a bit specific... Any which way, here they are!

I resolve to spend more time with family. Extended family. Family I haven't seen in days, months or even years. This is my biggest resolution for 2012. In particular I resolve to spend more time with my paternal grandmother and aunt, Gabby and Ellen. Also I must set aside time to spend with my maternal aunt, Clare. She is not doing so well and this worries several of us. Aside from this, though I see them often, I resolve to spend more QUALITY time with my mom and siblings. They were the biggest part of my childhood and I miss them.

I resolve to get back to regular exercise. The past year was a doozy in this department. I had a foreign object injected into my body which threw everything "off" and left me sluggish. It caused me to gain 10 pounds that wouldn't budge, whether I sat on the couch binging or ran my heart out while drinking only water. Months after removing the object my weight dropped significantly and my energy took off again. Finally close to my original weight, I am ready to take off again!

I resolve to finish a 10k in under an hour. I've been resolving to do this for a few years but keep waiting for the perfect time to start. I should know there will be no perfect time and circumstance, no incredible words that will come to me or magical motivation that will make it happen overnight. I need to suck it up and just work toward it! It will be hard but it will be worth it!

I resolve to take better pictures and more of them. More BETTER pictures. Taking pictures is not hard for me, it's taking GOOD ones. I resolve to visit the library to find books about using my camera and about taking better photographs in general.

I resolve to take many, many more family pictures. More pictures of my foursome. By the end of the year I want more pictures of the four of us than just a foot-pic and a silly-mustaches pic. I love them, but I want more.

I resolve to own our next home outright by the end of the year. Brad and I are purchasing the house that was his grandparent's home. We are so close that I am excited. We are planning to sell the rent house that Brad has been working on and put that toward what we have left to pay. The title is already in our name, now we are waiting to fix it up to move into sometime in the spring. Having a home that is completely paid for will feel so liberating!

I resolve to continue my frugal ways. More thrift store trips, more clearance racks... All in the name of taking care of the bigger stuff. All in the name of less worry and more security.

I resolve to scrapbook the more important parts of life. More specific moments, more feelings, more parts that mean so much. Less pictures with generalized journaling that doesn't tell the story of our lives. More moments that I never want to forget. More pages that make me smile and relive a scenario, a feeling, a thought.

I resolve to try. To go for it more often when there's something that I want. And to believe that I am capable and can achieve or obtain what I desire.

There are surely many more resolutions that I will have for this year. I will take them as they come. I will do what I can to achieve them. I will stay positive and keep moving.

2012, I am ready for you!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-28T10:27:00.000-08:00

Christmas came and went before I knew what had happened! I am thankful to say that I am at a loss of pictures because I was busy having fun and being in the moment! And finishing matching pj pants.. They were a hit and Nene got lots of cute pictures! Same goes for Baby AJ's bunting. Mama made me a little bashful, oohing and aahing over how it looked "store-bought" and "beautiful!", and brother Anthony seemed grateful for the homemade gift for his little guy.

I am a little jealous. I didn't pull out my camera for the best pics.. My favorites are on Mama's new iPhone from Mike [no wonder why he's the favorite! ;) ] and on Nene's camera.. :( Wonder if there's a way to get them to share. :)

Otherwise, I do have some pictures from the day before and the day after..

So happy for family! So thankful and blessed! Hope all were surrounded by loved ones and a great holiday...including video game battles with younger brothers! ^^

Class Christmas Parties

2011-12-22T21:00:00.001-08:00

Wednesday was a hectic day.. I hurried through finishing 3 teacher's gifts and a batch of cookies (+ making peppermint frosting..YUM!) to make it to 2 Christmas parties within an hour and a half. At two different schools. It was a rush but very fun.

First I went to Riley's party where there were very cute ideas for the children's activities. Icing and decorating a cookie, a triangle piece of bread decorated to look like a reindeer with M&M eyes and nose and pretzel antlers, plus a game of slathering vaseline on the kids' chins and counting how many cotton balls they could get when they smushed their face into a bowl of them. Riley, being my tender-touch dude, only ended up with 1 due to his reluctance to have anything (that he couldn't eat) smeared on his face. He didn't make it to the reindeer-bread station or to stay for unwrapping his book gift because we had to dash over to Meli's school for her party..

For Meli's party I had agreed to come up with a craft for her teacher. I was more than happy to supply her with some of my overabundant scrapbook goodies for the children to use to make painted+glittered chipboard ornaments. Very quick, very easy and very fun for the kids. Meli loved it and loved every minute of the party. Later that evening she told me that she loved that I showed up for her party. Did she think that I wouldn't?! Probably, since I was 5 minutes late.

I'm glad that I got to be there for their excitement! Even if Riley only gave me pictures like this.. ^^^

The way I scrap

2011-12-17T13:18:00.001-08:00

I've been thinking a bit lately about my scrapping. How I wish I was doing more of it, how I wish I could scrap every minute of everyday and have every little scrap goody my heart desires... Oh, to dream. But I am too much of a realist. No matter how cute the goodies on the shelves are I can't avoid the voice that tells me, "You have plenty.. You have MORE than plenty. You need to use what you have."

I like to think that using what I have will make me more creative. IDK. I am in an odd state of trying to make "old" stuff feel and look "new"...or at least not dated. Through this I have found a style that seems to work well for me. I have grown to love plain white paper. It goes with everything and you can add and do so much to it! You can add a little or a bunch of patterned paper so as to highlight or hide whether it has a new-enough look or a dated one..

I've found that I love to fussy-cut and layer multiple sheets of white in many intriguing ways. There are so many ways to change it up and have mostly used white paper.

Aside from finding a love for plain white cardstock I have also found that I love to make my pages a bit on the messy side with some order to it. Perfect pages don't work for me. Life isn't perfect. Life isn't completely orderly. Everything doesn't run smoothly all the time. My childhood was a chaotic one (with 4 younger brothers how could it not be?) and no matter how much I try to make it orderly it will always have a messiness to it. And that's the way I like it.

I love my style. I know that there is influence from the styles that are sweeping the blogs and scrapbooking sites that I frequent but I can't help but think that my style would have the messy feel regardless of what the trend is. My pens and scissors have been my favorite tools since I started scrapping and "frugal" should be my middle name.. These are what have always made up my scrapping style and likely always will.

Garden of Lights

2011-12-13T19:49:00.001-08:00

In my hometown there is a park that hosts a "Garden of Lights" every year. It's a magical little experience with tree after tree, bush after bush filled with twinkling lights. I can't help but experience it at least once every year. Nowadays that once is during a weekend visit to see family.

This year it was just me, the kids + Morgan. I can't believe we lasted an hour crawling along with the traffic just to make it into the park! The kids did a pretty good job of keeping each other company in the backseat. Very little complaining. More questions and musings.

I believe it was worth it. The lights were as lovely as ever. The "dancing trees" intrigued Meli for days afterward.

Now I have this marked off my Holiday 2011 Bucket List and I can move on to baking cookies, wrapping presents and kissing my B-Rad on New Years!

Note: So proud of myself for learning a new camera trick during this little excursion.. I learned that if I set my camera to the AV setting it gave me much better pictures!

What I'm up to..

2011-12-09T09:25:00.000-08:00

The holiday season is in full-swing and I am just rolling along with it. I don't tend to get too wrapped up in making everything perfect. I do things just "right enough" and move on along. No use in wearing yourself out, over-stressing and making what should be a season of joy into a season of fret..

I've been working on a Christmas card and when I say "working on" I mean I grabbed one of the only recent pics I have of my foursome and photoshopped some color-blocks and wording around it. The message was silly/sweet to go along with the pic but not over-thought. I just did what I thought I'd enjoy receiving and moved on..

I've been helping with Christmas lists.. The handy thing is that Meli has really taken off on reading and writing, but the un-handy part is that I still have to be there to spell lots of words for her.. This was fun though and when the list was completed it was very informative for the grandparents.

I've pulled out the holiday decor and Riley has checked the battery status on the musical pieces.. That little guy is crazy about batteries! He can name almost any size and he knows how to find an objects battery-latch and get it open, screws or not.

I've been becoming accustomed to my first married Christmas without a real tree. Brad and I have bought a real tree every Christmas since we got together but last year we decided to buy a clearanced artificial one after the holidays. Mistake. It seems a bit sad after the real ones. It is still a tree, though, and we are enjoying it!

I've been sewing. Pants. Lots and lots of pants. I am becoming a master of sewing pants. If I decide to sew Christmas jammies next year at least I'll have the process streamlined and know exactly what I'm doing.. :)

I've been reading winter/Christmas books. Like this gem Nene gave us last year. Mr. Riley can't get enough of it.

We've been pulling out the sweaters and scarves. It's been downright chilly around here and I'm not sure we were ready for it.

I've been making cups and cups of hot chocolate. With lots of mini-marshmallows and mini-candy canes. :)

I've been slathering the Aquaphor all over Meli's lips every time I get the chance. That girl! I wish she'd just stop licking!!

I've been enjoying my cute little red shoes b/c they seem so festive! I love 'em even if they leave my feet a smidge cool..

I've been constructing gingerbread houses. Well, foam houses but there's no need to get technical. :) Next up on the agenda Meli wants to decorate a real gingerbread house.

Did I mention that I've been sewing? Yeah, that's been a lot of my focus recently.. Thankfully sewing is one of my most relaxing hobbies! :)

Thankful.

2011-11-24T13:03:00.000-08:00

It is Thanksgiving Day 2011. Can't believe it's already this time of year. So much has happened since this time a year ago. Change of job, change of location, a couple of new homes (rent+to-fix-up-and-move-into). Lots more time with family this past 6 months..

Today we are experiencing Thanksgiving with extended family. In past years we stayed in Dallas, made a turkey meal for our little foursome and geared up for Black Friday. This year we are a 10-minute drive from fam. What a change! I am thankful.

I am thankful for so much. I am sitting here wondering what I don't have to be thankful about.

I am thankful for God and my relationship with Him.
For Brad, the most incredible husband I could have--handsome, handy, loving, logical, supportive, surprising, silly...
For Amelia, such a sweet, caring, smart, thoughtful girl, my little clone.
For Riley, the smiliest little character God could have given me.
For my mom, my siblings, my nieces and nephews..
For such an enormous extended family, though I don't get to see them near enough. (I am especially thankful for my Aunt Shirley, my next best friend to Brad.)
For having a warm, loving home.
For good food to sustain us.
For health.
For good friends.
For financial comfort, which I have not always felt.
For wisdom through experience.
For education and knowledge.
For the country in which I was born and raised.
For simple pleasures.
For internet, cell phones and cameras. Modern conveniences that have made contact with friends and family incredible.
For memories and traditions.
For get-togethers.

And for a little silliness thrown in there, for Black Friday. That's what I'll soon be experiencing. ;)

You say it's your birthday..

2011-11-21T19:56:00.000-08:00

(duh-da-da-da-duh-duh)

The highlight of last week was a certain little ladies BIG DAY. A big, happy birthday for my Sweet Meli! The big 6.

It was a good but hectic week. I chose to have a party the Saturday before for her classmates + Riley + Kiera. Then we ended up having a family party on her actual birthday, fitted after school and before her school carnival. Gifts included a shiny new bike, plenty of crafty goodies (makes my heart happy!), some dolls...

I think we made her entire week special! On a side-note, I am so-so-so happy that she has started to express her enthusiasm. In years past we received what came to be known as her "delayed enthusiasm". Brad and I joked that you couldn't tell how excited Meli was about anything until a week had passed, until she was convinced enough that whatever gift or event had happened was truly hers or for her...then she would BURST with joy, so excited!

Well, on with my typical picture-overload!

Thank you, Dada, for the awesome castle!

Barbie-themed party...kinda.

The whole brood.

Wild-child Kiera having some fun!

Birthday girl!

Special birthday-day breakfast, Meli's request, pancakes (+ eggs)
slathered in syrup and sprinkles...

Enjoying the meal, surrounded by decorations...

Birthday Girl with her self-chosen outfit, complete with "fancy" shoes. :)

Gotta have a pile of balloons...

Awesome gift from Papa and Nene... I can't speak for Meli,
but I really enjoyed this toy!

Birthday night at the school carnnival...Butterfly for Meli,
sword for Riley... "L on her forehead" for the girl that tried
to cut the line. :D

At the "Photo-Op". (Pssst, having a photo area was my idea and the photo-strips
+ velvet rope was mine and Brad's handiwork!)

A very happy end to a very happy day for a very happy
Birthday Girl!

One more year older. I try to tell her to stop growing but she just won't listen! ;)

It's hard work being the mom...

2011-11-17T14:16:00.000-08:00

According to Riley, I have a very important job!

Lunch Dates

2011-11-16T13:00:00.001-08:00

Every Wednesday I eat lunch at school with Riley.
Every Thursday I eat lunch at school with Meli.

I wouldn't miss these dates for the world. They make my day. They make my week. They're those few moments that are snatched back from school which has become such a big part of our time and our lives. I miss my little people. I feel strange not having them "on my hip" everywhere I go. But I am learning to let go of them. I am becoming more comfortable every day with letting them move on into the world away from me. I am learning once again to be by myself and to be alright with that.

It's funny to think how many times I must have complained over the past 6 years about my lack of alone-time. To complain about dragging those little people along everywhere. And yet I am now unsure what to do without them. But I am learning.

I am beginning to wonder if I need those lunch dates more than they do. I know that it makes their day. I see it in their faces. I've heard it from the teachers. But something tells me that it means more to me than to them.

Never Again

2011-11-15T10:48:00.001-08:00

This year I have become a bit more solemn the last few days before a birthday. I have found a new phrase that echos through my head and heart for the weeks leading up to the big day.

Never again.

Right now that phrase is on repeat followed by the words "will I ever know a 5-year-old Meli again..."

It saddens me so much. I definitely look forward to how she will grow and who she will grow into, but my heart aches so much to know that she is hardly 'little' anymore. She is almost her very own person. She has her own thoughts and feelings. She knows what she likes and what she doesn't like. She makes more and more of her own choices.

I am so proud of my 5-year-old girl. I don't think I'm ready for 6. It has sneaked up on me.. I don't recognize my Amelia as being that little bundle that I squeezed so lovingly just shy of 6 years ago. I don't recognize Amelia as being that once toddler that wanted things her way and wanted to be left alone...makes my heart smile to remember that. I vaguely remember my Amelia as being the preschool-age little girl that was so helpful with her little brother and such a teacher+helper to him. Now I look back over the past year and though it's much more fresh in my mind I know that soon all I will have left of 5-year-old Amelia is a bunch of pictures and some stories that I've ingrained in my memory and some drawings that she created.. But the 5-year-old Meli herself will be gone. Replaced with an older and wiser Meli.

Looking back over the past 6 years I can't help but ask myself if what I've done is 'right'. I see such a seriousness in so much of her demeanor and I wonder if I expected too much of her. I wonder if I didn't let her be enough of a kid, if I asked her to be too mature. I see her silly, immature side come out here and there, I see that pictures of her with a silly pose, but I am only reminded that those times seem few and far between...

I am going to miss my 5-year-old Meli immensely. I know that I am going to forget the quirks that she's had this past year and the things she would say frequently. Because of this I can't help but document what I can from this past year. Perhaps someday I will have the time to recount some of the stories that go with these pictures, to add to the story and give a broader account of who Meli was, but for now I am going to savor what I can..

Yes, it's picture-overload. A year provides a lot of stories to tell and memories to keep...

2011-11-10T19:25:00.000-08:00

It's been 10 days since I last blogged...

Right now we're still eating away at the half-full grocery bag of Halloween candy placed waaaaay out of the reach of little hands...

I am preparing for Meli's birthday party on Saturday, the 12th, by sewing crepe paper decorations and trying to clear the backyard. It's supposed to be beautiful on the day of the party which is a relief!

I am working on my photo-op booth for the carnival at Meli's school. Coming along beautifully, I think. Thanks to Brad. The theme is "Old Hollywood". In addition to working on the booth I have been making and hanging signs around the school.

Mama's birthday is Sunday. I wanted to take her to Zio's in Tulsa, which she loves, but that may have to be postponed. I took her last year though it was a few weeks late. I think she enjoyed it. Maybe this year I can find a time for Heidi and I to both take her?

Honestly, I know there must be much more going on in my life right now but I just can't think of anything other than birthdays and the carnival. And for some reason I am just not inspired to take pictures recently...nothing new to show for the moment.

Happy Halloween!

2011-10-31T20:58:00.000-07:00

With two little ones overcoming a stomach bug we seemed destined to miss our trick-or-treating this year, but they made it through! I am so happy they did! This is a yearly event where we head out as a little family, ready to see what the evening will bring...

This year it was 2 teenagers with giant boxes decorated as Pac-Man and one of the ghosts, chasing each other down the street. Meli running into a classmate and stopping to hang out for a chat. Another 4-year-old being intrigued with Riley's costume and wanting to walk with him for the rest of the night (little kids are so cute!). Then there were countless adults wanting to eat our kids... :)

A cute little cupcake!

A cheesy-grinning little cheeseburger!

The T-or-T was loads of fun but we were definitely ready when it was time to get home.. Once we made it there we poured out the "loot" (Brad enjoyed my terminology..) and the bargaining (and complaining) began. I'd have to say these two made out pretty well for being 4 and 5 years old...

After an hour of oohing and aahing over the bounty, I was able to coax them into helping me load it up then take off to bed. That was a little too easy, but I'm not complaining. ;)

Wonderful evening with my wonderful little family....I couldn't ask for more!

Blog Your Heart

2011-10-31T12:43:00.000-07:00

Following Stephanie Howell's challenge I am participating once again in "Blog Your Heart". So, here goes...

Last night I felt importance in my title as MOM. And it wasn't pretty.

In the middle of the night my 5-year-old caught the stomach bug that has made it's way around our house. Somehow hers was 10 times worse than the rest of ours. I don't know how it happened but the mom in me came right out. I was by her side, supplying water, a damp cloth, soothing her and telling her just the right things. I am generally a "suck it up" kind of mom unable to coddle but last night I couldn't help holding her and whispering, "It's alright, baby. It's not your fault.. We all have these accidents at some time.." I moved into action. There was a lot to be cleaned and everytime I seemed to get started there was more mess to clean up. I handled it with amazing agility. Looking back, I am stunned.

I felt my purpose. It wasn't an ideal circumstance, but I guess it rarely is. Today I am sitting with a recovering little girl and an almost recovered little boy, grateful that this bug is almost gone but also gratefully reminded that my part in this little family is truly a significant one.

Do something

2011-10-31T08:06:00.000-07:00

Go outside.
Take a picture.
Take several pictures.
Find something you've never seen before.
Or look closer at something you see everyday.
Ask a question.
Seek an answer.
Find an inspirational quote.
Or an inspirational picture.
Read a story.
Write a story.
Document a memory.
Make a new one.
Hug someone tightly.
Listen intently.
Make a change for the better.
Set a goal.
Work toward a goal.
Declutter your home.
Simplify your life.
Take a walk.
Or a run.
Anything energetic.
Bake a treat.
Cook a new meal.
Tell a joke.
Laugh.
Make a homemade gift.
Make a card.
Share your time.
And attention.
Play with your kids.
With their toys.
Turn on some music.
Turn off the T.V.
Don't sit.
Go.

you are invited.

2011-10-28T08:12:00.000-07:00

Made Meli's birthday invitations yesterday. It was hard getting decent pictures. Then it was hard choosing one...

In the end we went with the jumping one! It seemed to be the most fun and the one that we all agreed on the best. Now I have to work on making the party as fun as the invite. I have a few ideas, I just hope I can put them into action. And that I can step back, enjoy and not try to micro-manage. I say "try" because I'm honestly no good at it.

Signs of Fall

2011-10-28T07:57:00.000-07:00

This fall we've had a great time...except for the sickness Riley brought home from school. I guess we found the #1 downer to going to school. Other than that, we've been scurrying around, getting to school, cramming reading and life into the rest of the time and sleeping. :)

As can be seen from the collage, we have enjoyed this season so far. A trip to the pumpkin patch, fall decor, festivals/fairs, sewn Halloween clothes, pumpkin+pasta meals, costumes, pumpkins to carve/paint. + so much more that isn't shown here.

I love everything that this season has brought so far!

I

2011-10-24T19:16:00.001-07:00

I watch "How I Met Your Mother" over and over..

I have recently found the blissfulness of Dark Chocolate Hershey's Kisses and wondered where they've been all my life!

I have just realized that I can still make it over 5 miles in under an hour...

I am coaxing myself toward 10k in under an hour..6.2 miles..

I just finished 45/70 minutes of reading to Meli for the week...and it's only Monday!

I had a pretty good day with the little (sick) dude today. I've missed getting to hang with him all day everyday.

I spent the weekend with my college buddies Jun and Kelli. It was great getting to ride down to Texas and back with Kelli, chatting about anything and everything. And I think it helped our friendship with Jun.

I spent a good amount of time at Jun's answering questions about pregnancy and babies/kids. Junnie is about 16 weeks along with her first!

I watched Greg, Junnie's husband, do a remarkable job with Amelia and Riley! He is a natural!

I have come back home in a peaceful mood because of the time I spent around good friends.

I was more taken with Brad making it home from Muskogee than I have been in a while. Every weekend that he's gone I feel at a loss, but for some reason this weekend I just felt so thankful for him and our great relationship and I wanted to be close and chat and chat and chat.

I keep putting off pumpkin-painting/carving with the kids..I think I'm weary of Meli's intense desire to carve hers and I'm reluctant to have to pull out the paint then clean it up.. :(

I am wishing that I had more of an interest in football. I used to care at least a little. That was when I was surrounded by 4 brothers who loved it. Now I have Brad who doesn't seem to care a lick. Well, unless OU is doing bad so the hype is down. :)

I have suddenly become very proud of OSU...they're standing is at about 3 while OU's is 11. Woot!

I have the song "Boys of Fall" by Kenny Chesney running on repeat through my head..

I tried a pumpkin pasta recipe today...won't be doing that again...

I have officially drank my apple cider for the year. As far as that's concerned I'm now ready for winter and all the hot chocolate that comes along with it!

I know that I must enjoy Halloween first, though. This year the kids are going to be a hamburger and and cupcake! And I'm going to be a waitress. :D

I also must enjoy Meli's 6th birthday. I've been thinking about a party, but I will likely not follow through as always.. :(

I can't wait for Black Friday.

I have just realized that it's time for bed... ;)

......

Ghostly

2011-10-23T17:46:00.000-07:00

With little more than a week until Halloween how fitting is this creepy pic of Meli?? I was just trying to get a cute pic without using the flash...

Picture day

2011-10-19T18:59:00.000-07:00

Funny that I should call this post "picture day" considering that almost EVERYDAY is picture day for my kids... I think Meli has finally realized that there is no escaping my camera and since that time she has become a real ham to the camera.

In spite of my constant picture-snapping, I am calling this post picture day on the basis that someone else got to snap those memories of my child...and I can't wait to see what they captured. In the meantime, I am savoring my own pre-shoot! :)

I will never forget picking out the *perfect* outfit weeks in advance. Similar colors to what I wore for pictures as a child, only this was much more poofy!

I will never forget the hair. The way we woke half an hour earlier to get it curled and still barely finished in time. But oh how pretty it turned out..

Most of all I will never forget the way Riley gasped when he saw her and exclaimed, "Meli's so PRETTY!" Oh that love and support!

So now I'm just waiting to see the outcome. And crossing my fingers.

All the time in the world...

2011-10-10T08:58:00.000-07:00

It has hit me a few times suddenly... Now that the kids are in school, most days I have "all the time in the world"... so what am I doing with it?

Nothing.

I am not chasing after dreams. I am not even figuring out what my dreams are. I am sitting still and watching possibilities pass me by. I do think, "I could do this..." or "Maybe I could do that.." but nothing is screaming out to me which bothers me. There must be something that I would love to be doing with my life. Something that I would love to do with my time and energy.

Nothing.

I remember a childhood so full of possibility and I felt like I could accomplish my dreams and goals. I did accomplish my childhood dreams and goals. Which leads me to believe that I didn't stretch them far enough.

I knew that at the time no-one in my family had ever been to college, but I really wanted to. Just making it to a university was an enormous goal for me. I made it.

I wanted to have a great guy that was a great provider that would be my lifelong partner in providing a loving, wonderful family to our kids and for ourselves... Um, I have it!

I wanted to have a warm, comfortable, generally up-kept home.. I'm there.

I have everything that I ever wanted as a child peering into the future. I do not feel empty in the least, I feel fulfilled. I am just left confused... Is there more to this story? Am I supposed to seek more? Am I supposed to design more questions, dreams and goals for myself so that I can work toward those, too? Or is it okay to just be content in looking back at the past and letting out a big sigh of contentment toward the present? Should I be more concerned about the future? Or even more concerned about the present?

Nothing.

I keep seeing the messages, "Listen to your heart" and "Follow your heart." What do you do when you're not hearing anything from your heart?

love isn't in things, it's in us.

2011-10-04T08:09:00.000-07:00

I had the most breath-taking, momentous conversation with Meli the other night. The kind where your 5-year-old surprises you with her insight and pulls at your heartstrings.

It is well-known that when it comes to toys and my kids "I don't buy them anything." Or so it seems. What that really means is that I don't buy them toys every time we go to the store. I don't buy them toys just because they have the gimme's. With that said, I do occasionally change things up and let them pick something out. Part of that is because I know that they don't expect it so it truly is a surprise and they do get overjoyed.

On Sunday Amelia and I went shopping at Wal-Mart. Typical shopping trip but since she hadn't been surprised with a toy in a while I let her pick out a Barbie set, any Barbie set (within reason) that she wanted.

I let her hold the box as we drove home and as we were talking she asked, "Mommy...why did you want to get this for me?" I thought for a moment, wondering if I had heard her right, then answered, "Because I love you and I wanted to make you feel loved." What she answered next brought me to tears:

"But I always know you love me."

I am crying as I type this. I feel so blessed and I feel that I am doing something right. Meli is such an observant little girl and mature beyond her years.

I watch as she has cousins that are bombarded with toys and objects and I wish that I could give her everything her heart desires. But small moments and small sentences like the one above take those wishes away and make me remember that love isn't in things, it's in us. And it's in the time and attention that we give..

In order to end this on a happier note I will let it be known that Brad and I did give our time and attention just last night. I was playing Barbies with Meli as I had promised her when Brad decided to play Monster Trucks with Riley...and out of nowhere the Monster Trucks started attacking the Barbie camp-out, Barbies started scattering everywhere, screeching and running in circles while the one lone boy doll tried to karate chop and kick the Monster Trucks away..

Oh, my. What unexpected fun we have as a family. :)

4 tickets and a banana

2011-10-02T09:31:00.001-07:00

Meli and I went to a street festival with Nene yesterday and had a blast! Kiera was along and it was such fun watching the girls together.

The first thing we did was head to the rides. While waiting in a line a guy walked up and handed Meli four leftover tickets. Then only moments later a boy walking by asked her if she wanted his banana prize he had won. What luck Meli had! She was stuck to that banana for the rest of the day. :)

It was a little crowded at this point but the girls still enjoyed the rides:

The alligator roller-coaster...

the ferris wheel...

a break from rides to get their faces painted...

the octopus...

I just realized I never got a pic of the Tilt-A-Whirl...while standing in line Meli turned to me and proclaimed, "Mommy, we don't NEED you to ride with us!?!" Guess I'm officially becoming uncool... :)

By this point the crowds had thinned, so we refreshed with a giant coke and some cotton candy. We found our way to the little-little kiddie area and let Meli and Kiera run around to the rides on their own while we sat on the curb watching and eating the cotton candy. At one point the girls yelled from the carousel, "Nene, stop eating our cotton candy!!" Heehee! We got a kick out of that! We also got a kick out of Meli running back to us to exclaim, "We are SUPER BIG for these rides!" They were the preschool rides. :)

Seeing how big they are, I don't understand why they wanted to ride this so much, but they didn't want to get off afterward..

The motorcycle ride...

And the grand finale was really a grand finale! They were just big enough to ride on this big-kid ride by themselves.. :/ Before the ride started Nene and I couldn't stop warning them, "Do not let go of the bar! Keep holding on tight! Don't put your hands in the air! Don't even wave! Keep holding the bar..."

All-in-all a fabulous day! And I think the girls had the time of their lives. :)

His first day of Pre-K

2011-09-28T14:56:00.000-07:00

Riley started Pre-K on Monday, which has been bittersweet for me. I was very excited for Meli to start Kindergarten because I had anticipated it for so long. But for as long as I could remember I also anticipated that during her first year of school it would just be Riley and I at home, bonding. Alas, it wasn't to be.

Over the past week I've watched him walk into school with a teacher, I've listened to him answer his teacher's questions, I've seen him interact with other kids and I can't help but feel proud. He is growing up and growing out. He is making new connections and experiencing something all new to him--spending his days surrounded with kids his age, getting to know lots of new people up close and personal. He is learning to make it through the day without Mom.

I never want him to lose his individuality, but I am happy that he is stepping out into the world. I want to hug him for all of the potential successes he will have but I also want to cry for all of the potential hurt or dangers. I am Mom, I am protective. It's my job.

I know that he will be fine. School is an exciting place and I have no doubt that he will enjoy what it has to offer. :)

Self-Timer

2011-09-20T12:25:00.000-07:00

Prompted by Dear Lizzy I joined the self-timer fun. I tried several different "regular" shots that I just wasn't happy with so finally I just plopped myself down on top of the kids (!) and refused to look at the camera! :)

I tried..and I won

2011-09-19T10:59:00.001-07:00

I tried. That is something I talk myself out of a lot. But as far as scrapping goes, lately I have put myself out there.

I don't know where the spark came from but I hit a point where I decided that I have now been scrapping for years and feel like I am understanding design. I feel more confident with the knowledge I've gained, with the thousands of pages that I've seen and studied, with the styles that I've tried to mimic and the journey to find my very own way of doing things.

I still make plenty of pages that disappoint me, but I have learned to throw together pages like this one...in an hour:

Yes, I did this in an hour and I am proud. And my trying + submitting paid off b/c I won the 1-hour challenge at Creating Keepsakes!

Here's to trying! :)

Pink Shoes

2011-09-17T21:22:00.000-07:00

It's another great reason to love having a little girl. Not just the pink shoes, but having someone that looks up to me and enjoys trying to match me. :)

Realizing that we were both wearing pink shoes made me remember this and this...
It warms my heart to know that I have a little one that looks up to me and thinks it's kinda cool to try to be like me.. Even if more often than not she actually does the opposite..but that stubbornness and need for independence is just more proof that we are cut out of the same cloth. :)

I love this little lady. I love that she wants so badly to be her own person. I love that her need to be her own person is just more proof that she and I are alike. <3

On a side-note, I would like to say that today was a great day..we spent the morning at a make-up gymnastics class, participated in the world record for most people doing a handstand at the same time, spent the afternoon at a big, nice park with Nene and Kiera, and had a big cookout dinner with Papa, Nene and Kiera. It is so great being back near family, even if it can be frustrating at times. Oh yeah, and at some point Meli decided to give herself bangs... :/

Tomorrow we have plans for the FAIR! Can't wait, it's gonna be great! :)

Real

2011-09-14T10:28:00.000-07:00

Prompted by one of my favorite bloggers, Stephanie Howell, today I will post what's "real" in my life to me, right now..

Hard to know where to begin, so I'll just jump right in.

Brad. I still feel that he's the most incredible guy that God could have pushed into my life. I still know that we enjoy our lives together, that arguments are only opportunities for passion and making up, that we would not trade each other for anyone else in the world. I look back to when we started out and I see many lazy movies-on-the-couch nights and trying to be together constantly..now I see two people who can hardly snatch half an hour without work or the kids between us. We still connect, we still reach for each other and we still desire time together...I guess this is just a hectic time in our lives where we must snatch what we can and wait for the days when things slow a bit.

Amelia. She is growing so beautiful and independent, funny, smart, witty, dependable.. She has started school and is in gymnastics and the more I watch her and the more I listen, the more I have to pry my hands and my wishes off of her life and realize that it is hers and that she will be wonderful. She has lots of friends and enjoys every day. She is a mix of sillier and crankier every day.

Riley. He is not so clingy anymore, but he still craves attention as much as ever. I am so proud listening to him speak up with others, opening up faster than I've ever seen him do. He is becoming the boy that I thought he would be--talkative and "cool". I wonder what goes on in his little head. I often see the gears turning. I see curiosity and wonder. I wish that I fed that curiosity and wonder more. I feel that I neglect him more lately. He gets pulled along wherever I feel like going to whatever I feel like doing. It saddens me and I need to slow down and give him the attention he deserves.

Home. Right now "home" consists of living in my in-laws former home for a few months. Home doesn't feel a lot like home, but we are grateful to have a place. It has rocky times and seems to be getting more strained with time, but I am staying as positive and graceful as I can in this situation.

Family. I was happy to be away for 5 years, making it on our own...moving back has proven to be just as should have been expected. There is drama. There are moods. Petty arguments and tempers. I believed that living closer would be better, some days I'm not so sure. I stay away from confrontation but I wonder for how long. I watch the things that I didn't want to know were happening. Living closer, I see more, hear more, know more... I don't want to see, hear or know some things that I do. But I guess that's life. I know that I can't live other people's lives for them but there are so many instances where I want to shake people and say, "What the hell are you thinking?! Why do you do the stuff you do? ..."

Me. I am at peace. I am happy and thankful. I struggle to retain modesty and I sometimes feel myself starting to let chaos into my life, but all-in-all I am keeping my calm. I am confident that I can resolve issues. I now know what I am good at and one of those things is avoiding problems in the first place. I have come to terms with the fact that I am me and that's all I must be...In some instances I need to tweak the "me" that I am, but only in what ways make me feel more alive and joyful. I love myself with the realization that only if we truly love ourselves correctly can we love others correctly. I do not ask others to do what I can do for myself. I don't ask others for much of anything. I have learned lessons such as these the hard way, but I am thankful for each lesson and I carry them with me.

Where I was 10 years ago..

2011-09-11T16:12:00.000-07:00

Someday my children may hear the phrase, "Where were you on 9-11?" and wonder what exactly that means. Perhaps these things are very important to teach our children...not just what happened but what we can learn from these things....thoughts, perspectives..

A quick recap of where I was 10 years ago, literally and figuratively:

-10 years ago today, in the morning hours of the day, I was in a Geology lab taking a quiz. I was trudging through my first year at OSU, depressed and out-of-touch. I was the last student to leave the room, but just as I started toward the door a TA hurried into the room, urgent to relay breaking news to my TA. A plane had flown into one of the Twin Towers, he exclaimed to his friend. I thought, "Wow, these guys are really concerned about this.." as I calmly strolled out of the room and back to my dorm. Out of curiosity I flipped on the TV and found that 2 planes had ran into the towers. I continued watching and learned of a third plane that had been flown toward the Pentagon. This was unsettling to me, yet I still didn't quite understand what this meant. "Who would want to do this?" "What sort of people would do this--they must be mentally/emotionally unstable.." "We don't have to worry about the people that would do this because they will not be able to do this again." "I am thankful to be in an entirely different area of the country from this." "Surely nothing like this would take place in the little towns that I've lived in all my life...this sort of thing only happens in enormous cities that are full of people so I don't have to worry about this..."...

Yes, I was self-absorbed and cocky. I had no family or friends in big cities so I didn't have to worry about that happening to anyone I know..

I lived on a university campus. I didn't really know differences between Christians, Muslims, Hindus, agnostics, etc. even though I passed a diverse population of all of these every day... I still believed in people and their basic desire to be and do good (which I still do believe in every person's potential to be and do good, I just know that there are some which don't for some reason or another).

9-11 was left as a bunch of question marks in my mind and heart. I didn't know it at the time, but something inside me knew that I would learn the significance of that day over time.

It saddens me to remember the me of 6 months after 9-11...I somewhat miss her innocence.
6 months later I walked into my first-ever architecture studio and when I walked out that evening I walked alongside one of the most soft-spoken, amazingly gentle people I have ever met in my life. Her name was Najah and she wore an outfit I had only seen in pictures...a loose-fitting garment that covered her hair and all her body. Only her face and her hands showed from her clothing, and she had the most compassionate, friendly eyes. She loved to smile and was slow to laugh but her laugh was sincere. Everything about her was careful yet sincere.

I didn't yet understand that Najah was Muslim... Because I didn't yet know that there were supposedly huge differences between Najah and myself, I only saw Najah as Najah. I wonder about what Najah thought of the naive girl that wanted to be her friend. I wonder what she thought of the girl that saw her garment and thought of Najah as posing no threat, that thought of Najah as being intriguing and someone that she wanted to understand better, culturally.

I remember the evenings in studio when Najah would teach me about her culture. She would show me the way they read, which was the opposite of the way we do, from right to left. I remember when Najah showed me how to write my name in Arabic and how I thought part of my name looked sort of like "J Lo".. :) I don't remember how she wrote it (it's somewhere in my old architecture stuff, I think..) but I remember the fascination I had while she showed me and while I asked more questions.

I remember driving to Hastings with Najah with me later in the semester and never even realizing that others may think it was odd. I remember discussing a certain person with Najah and she quietly admitted that she found the person very conceited and too self-assured...a person that I was slowly becoming friends with and who was also an international student that I was fascinated with. I remember asking Najah if I could hear the tape that she always listened to while she worked, which was in Arabic..she was reluctant, but learned that I wasn't going to judge her negatively from it, but that I was sincerely interested. I remember giving her rides home, even amid her reluctance. I remember once, after our first studio together when I saw her walking across the street toward the Architecture building and I HONKED! at her like I was mad...I knew that she wouldn't be offended, but that she would be thrown off...I did it, then rolled down the window to smile and say "Hi!" She gave a relieved smile and laughed about it while holding her heart like it scared her. :) That's exactly the response I expected and that's why I loved to be around her and joke with her.

I miss Najah and I sometimes wonder how she's doing. I have no idea how I would find her, even in the age of Facebook. I've thought of asking friends who may also remember her, but I've decided to let it go for now and to remember the great times and innocence of my friendship with her.

When I remember Najah I also remember Ahmed. Ahmed was a guy that was in my 3rd architecture studio (yes, when I talk about college I talk about studios a lot..they made up 6 credit hours per semester and we were to be in studio from 1:00-5:00 at least 4 days per week, preferably 5 days, late nights and weekends, too). Ahmed just happened to chose the desk sitting across from me that semester. He was short and very quiet. He started out only talking to one person--a tall, also quiet guy that sat in the corner. The difference was that while Ahmed was slow to talk, smile or laugh he had a demeanor similar to Najah whereas the other guy seemed...angry, hostile. I was still in a naive state, not knowing that Ahmed and I were supposed to have some major differences that made us unable to be friends... It took time but I kept talking to him. Mostly it was about class. I made little jokes every once in awhile though I was not usually a joking type, I was very serious. Still I didn't feel any threat from him and I treated him as I would want to be treated. I will say that I never became good friends with Ahmed, but I do think I had his trust. The next semester he chose the seat across from me and we often discussed studio and I would ask questions about other classes.

These are the first two people that I think of when I think of "Muslims". I remind myself that they are rays of light in my past, people that I connected with on some level and that I don't want to forget. People that I am thankful to have had the experience of meeting and knowing. I am not saying that they are incapable of "bad" but rather that those thoughts are irrelevant. The Najah and Ahmed I knew posed no threat to me or anyone else, and I like to believe that they felt that I posed no threat to them.

So, remembering 9-11 I can't help but conclude that we are "supposed" to loathe and somewhat fear Muslims... but with what experience I have had I can't generalize that way. I now fear for more events such as 9-11 and my heart hurts when I recall the lives that were taken that day...

But I can't stop believing in individuals and their potential for good.

2 women, 3 kids and a tent

2011-09-08T15:04:00.000-07:00

Yep, we went on a camping trip. We were "roughing it" as Morgan would say. Okay, so it isn't exactly roughing it when you leave camp to drive back to town each day. And you have bathroom facilities and access to running water and electricity. But we were a far cry from Heidi's friend that was "roughing it" in a camper!

I don't know about the rest but I had a blast hanging out! Heidi and I don't spend nearly enough sister-time together. We could use more of it.

I think one of the best parts for all of us was when we went swimming. The first time we went was the first morning after we woke up. After the temperature being in the 100's right up until that point, we woke to 70-something degrees, but that didn't deter us. The wind was nippy but the water was a wonderful lukewarm.

By the time we made it back to the tent the wind picked up and it started misting. So we spent a couple of hours just hanging.

There was quite a bit of this...

..isn't that what camping is for? :)

Oh, yeah. I can't forget to mention the one-legged goose. Poor thing...the other geese shunned it and the kids wouldn't stop chasing it! :( I have to admit, though, that it was kinda funny watching it hop away..

How about a re-enactment by Heidi? Actually, I think she was acting like a penguin... ?

More hangin'.

Fun times at the marina.

Oh, yes. My favorite part of the trip! Keeping the fire blazing and roasting marshmallows. :)

In the midst of the trip I was even caught in a few pictures! This one is compliments of Meli.

Gathering wood for those fires I loved so dearly..

Heidi and Morgan picture also taken by Meli. I love how she got "women" in it, too. hehe

Morgan...what a poser! lol

Riley, always trying to figure stuff out..

Morgan.

After our first venture into the water. Meli refused to go a second time. I can't really blame her.

Morgan and Meli with friends Sagen and Noah.

And that's the trip in an overload of pictures! Good memories! Hopefully next year we can do it again.

Participating with CK

2011-09-07T15:56:00.000-07:00

About a week ago I finished a scraplift game with the Scrappin' Mamas..

(Remember me?)

I had a lot of fun and was very inspired by a page by my friend Jill. I was also very happy with the way my page came out. Usually when I envision a page the end-product looks nothing like what I had in mind. But this one came out like a dream.

I noticed a CK post on Facebook that asked their fans to post a picture or page that they might choose to use as their profile picture of the week..so I got brave. And I submitted my "First Day of Preschool" page. And they chose it!

I was stunned and happy as a clam. And still, a day later, every time I see a post from CK I beam! That's my layout!!

So call it euphoria but having my page chosen has made me feel like scrapping and like entering more scrapping challenges and putting myself out there! So today I jumped right into a 1-hour challenge and this is what I came up with...

"Creepy Cupcakes"

Umm.. I don't know where I pulled that out of! A 1-hour challenge..I'm usually surprised if I finish a page in 1 day.

Well, I guess I am now a member of clubCK and the next scrapping post I have will probably be raving about how I have no time for my blog now that I have to keep up with challenges.. :)

Grumpy Mornings and The Waiting Game..

2011-09-02T08:43:00.000-07:00

School is in full-swing now and faces like this come with it....

Then I get to entertain myself while I wait for her in my car..

Right now I love everything about school, even these parts. In a couple of years, though, I'll have to ask myself if I still feel the same way. :)

Moody Meli

2011-08-31T12:53:00.001-07:00

Isn't that just the cutest sad stance you've ever seen? Of all the pictures I took this morning before school, even the ones where she perked up, this one was my very favorite. But thank goodness my Meli goes from sad to glad like THAT! :)

Scrap-Happy

2011-08-29T11:33:00.000-07:00

I've been awfully "scrap-happy" lately but just haven't found much time for actual scrapping. Thankfully I have taken the time to finish the scraplift challenge for the Scrappin' Mamas..and I am very, very HAPPY with how it came out! Thanks for the inspiration, Jill! It's so easy to scraplift a page that inspires! :)

While Meli's away

2011-08-29T09:05:00.000-07:00

..with Riley I play. And I love it! I love how everything has to be messy &/or fast. All action all the time. Bright and lively.

I love how he doesn't yet realize that I'm "just a girl" and wants me to do every boy thing with him. Racing cars isn't something I'd choose to do but when this little guy asks me to join him it's the only thing I want to do..

He has me wrapped around his little finger. Case in point: even though I know it'll take me 5 minutes to squeeze his shoes into his skates when he'll only wear them for 3, I do it anyway...

Could this face be the reason?

Thankfully he has plenty of less-demanding toys to preoccupy him, too.. :)

My Big 4 Year Old

2011-08-19T10:21:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was Mr. Smiley-Riley's 4th birthday and I think he had a ball! (Or rather, a bunch of trucks!)

It was also Meli's first day of school, and Mawmaw decided to come up and celebrate both with us! So we ushered Meli into school then took off for Target where little guy hit the jackpot--not 1, not 2, not 3, but FOUR new monster trucks! The giant kind that he's been eyeballing, 2 die cast little ones and a tiny RC one that he carries everywhere.

I think he was thoroughly satisfied with the trucks and all the attention. Speaking of attention, I decided to forgo the pictures and be in-the-present. We played and laughed and just hung out. I didn't have a big party or decorations, other than the "Volcano cake" I didn't follow through with a theme, but I'm pretty sure that he had a great day. Between the monster trucks, CARS Geotrax and all the bubble toys I'm sure he was far too occupied anyway! :)

Happy Birthday, Mr. Smiley-Riley! Love you and hope it was a wonderful day. <3

Days 1 & 2

2011-08-19T09:36:00.001-07:00

Meli has officially started school and I think she was right--I am more excited than she is. I have mixed feelings about that, but it is what it is.

For the first day I was excited to get to dress her in a cute outfit that I had made. I was excited for her to get to meet other kids and see what differences and similarities there are. I am excited for the projects she will have and the things that she will learn and the ways that she will grow.

I was already excited that she had a project to do and it meant she had to share a little bit about herself with others. She needs that sort of prompting. The project was to fill a bag with some favorite things and this is what she included:

--a picture of Dada's race car b/c she loves that he used to race and she loves when she gets to go to races
--a picture of Dada and Mommy + a picture of her with Riley
--a Sonic cup to represent slushes, a favorite treat
--a princess notebook b/c she likes princesses and writing
--"Tiptoe Into Kindergarten" b/c it's a book that she loves to see over and over
--2 Strawberry Shortcake dolls b/c they're some favorite toys that she loves to smell

When I told her she might need to explain a few of her things she whispered, "But I don't want to... :(". I think she's a lot more bashful than I ever realized. I said alright and figured that her teacher would know what to say/do the next day, so I let it go. I was so happy to hear that she did tell them about her things b/c she had seen a couple of others do it first and decided that it would be ok.

We are currently on Day 2 and THIS is the outfit she's been anxious to wear..

Since the day Nene took her school-clothes shopping she's been dying to wear her self-chosen camo outfit. I wasn't too sure about it, but if it makes her feel cool+cute then I love it. :)

I was hoping that with her favorite school outfit on, she would go in more secure today but that wasn't the case. We entered the room to find that a new student was in the seat she had yesterday. I decided that it might be good for her to try a new spot around different kids.. She wasn't so sure.

She begged me to stay for a little bit so I did...until she waved at a passing girl and I asked, "Do you know her??" I realized that I couldn't take Meli's clinging seriously anymore! She said that the day before the cute little blond had asked her if she wanted to be friends. :-O Here I thought Meli was just sitting to the side watching the other kids and waiting to find a friend or two, when actually she had other kids in the class wanting to hang out with her! What a relief. :)

You would think it was me

2011-08-17T11:11:00.000-07:00

..that's heading off to school. In fact, a few days ago I told Meli, "I'm so excited for you to be starting school!" and she said? "I think you're more excited than me." Bummer. Maybe I'm a little too excited, but I can hardly help it. When I was a kid I lived for school. I, unlike most kids, dreaded summer (though I did find some fun in it!) because that meant months away. I have a feeling Meli won't feel the same way, but I'm hoping that she'll at least enjoy it while she's there. I bet she will. :)

Sooo, all of this just to say that we met her teacher today! And I choked up at first. And I think we hung out there the longest. And I signed up as a classroom mother.

It was awesome. And to add to the awesomeness, Meli already recognized a girl that she's met. A girl that's a friend of Kiera's (I'm beginning to believe that Kiera will be a "never-met-a-stranger" kind of person..).

A great start. And to add to the great start we already have a homework assignment. Fill a paper bag with some of Meli's favorite things and decorate. Oh, to go back to such fun, simple assignments! :) :) :)

Lately..

2011-08-11T14:58:00.000-07:00

The past couple of months have been very crazy. Summer is a hectic time for us anyway, but this year we threw a move into the mix..

Between packing, unpacking and several trips between Dallas, OKC and Muskogee we have been celebrating my birthday, both of Brad's parents birthdays, Brad and my anniversary and Brad's birthday. It's been a crazy ride this summer but in the end I am over-the-moon to be near family once again. The best, best, best part to me is the ability to just call and say, "Hey, are you home? We want to drop in this afternoon!" :)

Somehow with a house full of clutter and a head spinning from it, I justified some sewing and scrapping. Meli is in love with the bright 'rainbow' skirt I made for her. Cute, but I am having a doozy of a time figuring out what she can actually wear it with.

Oh, did I forget that we've thrown gymnastics (or, as it's name has morphed, from Bob-nastics, to Bob-nasty..) into the mix. Apparently Meli has become quite the little poser..
Must have something to do with the confidence she's been gaining. Earlier this week she had her first "advanced preschool" class.

Thankfully Meli's summer preschool ended. Though she loved school I think she learned pretty quickly how annoying it can be to wake up and rush off to get there...

Now that we're Okies again (well, in our hearts we were always Okies..) Brad has been more anxious than ever to get his rent house finished so that we can move on to more important things. Like buying our own house to live in. Meme has been a big help.

Since things have slowed down a bit for me I have spent an insane amount of time considering what Meli will wear for school. A few days ago we tried on some of her new outfits... I cannot believe she is about to head off to school and I cannot believe I am overdoing everything.

Life is sure to pick up again real soon. Next Monday, Nene wants to take Meli and Kiera to get their nails done (right up Meli's alley), we meet Meli's teacher on Wednesday, then Thursday the waking-up-early-each-day-getting-into-a-new-routine-dealing-with-a-grouchy-girl-fighting-the-traffic-rushing-not-to-be-late begins... :)

Dirty Thirty

2011-07-24T07:15:00.001-07:00

I meant to get to this yesterday, but...well, life just gets in the way sometimes.

Yesterday was Brad's 30th birthday! Happy (late) Birthday, handsome guy! Of all things, yesterday Brad spent his "dirty-thirty" packing and loading a U-Haul then cleaning a house. Needless-to-say, he was a mess. The kids were a mess. Everything was a mess! But at least now as I sit on the floor of this empty living room (being licked on the leg by Riley...yuck! stop!) I can breathe easier.

Though Brad didn't get a fabulous birthday, at least he got a wonderful birthday party a few days before. :) It's so nice being closer to extended family, so I invited Brad's parents and Kiera over for a surprise party! We decorated and I cooked a couple of Brad's favorites, homemade pizza and brownies. He didn't expect it at all and during+afterward he kept thanking me for throwing him a party and making his favorite foods.

It was one of those times when I felt like I did just the right thing and by making him feel special it made me feel special. <3

First class of her first session

2011-07-06T17:07:00.000-07:00

Today Meli officially started gymnastics. In the past she has visited Kiera's class with a free pass (below) and attended a gymnastics camp, but she herself has never been enrolled in a class..

I guess I can never again say that. She did a great job of listening to the teacher and doing just what she was supposed to do. I usually have no problem with that, though. I was very tickled watching her roll over and down things, lift herself into bridges, bounce on the trampolines... One of the cutest parts to me was watching her try to kick her legs out as she bounced, having some difficulty but continuing on anyway.

When we were finished she came out chatty, ready to tell me about the fun she had.

In following Papa's lead we like to tease the two girls by calling it "Bob-nastics" or "Bob-nasty". That really irritates Kiera but usually leaves Meli calmly saying, "No. It's gym-nastics...". After her class Meli was so excited that she herself said, "I LOVE bob-nasty!!" :) :)

I wonder if I'll be seeing this post-gymnastics face each week...

:)

In the midst of chaos...

2011-07-06T05:56:00.000-07:00

I choose to be grateful. And to work on fixing problems rather than making them worse.

Right now there is a lot of tension. Brad's parents + Kiera have moved to the new house, which should have made things a lot smoother. Instead it's been a difficult transition with plenty of wrinkles.

That's okay. As they always say, "This too shall pass." I've gotta have faith in that.

Pictures from yesterday

2011-07-03T09:35:00.001-07:00

I am happy as a clam to have my camera back and couldn't wait to get familiar with it again. Yesterday when Meli dressed herself so cute I couldn't help but loan her one of my pretty necklaces then snap a bunch of pictures..

I cannot believe how much older she seems everyday. I hadn't notice how long her hair is until I reviewed these pictures. Makes me smile because that's just what she wanted when she started school--to have long, pretty hair.

She's still my sweet Meli, but lately I've been spotting a little more of an ornery streak and I actually like that. Don't let her know but I'm glad that she's testing a little and just being such a kid at times instead of being too serious. I don't know if she's being a little more ornery from being around Kiera and other kids her age but I do know that since she's moved closer to "K" she's been using a faux-lisp.. That's bothering the daylights out of Brad and me. :(

Believe me, there are lots more pictures where these came from! And they're all of Meli. Seems that I have an issue with being one-sided... either all my attention goes to one kid or the other...

Recent scrapbook pages...now that I can get pictures again!

2011-07-03T02:06:00.000-07:00

If it weren't for the chaos of recently trying to move and sell a house I would have felt lost without my camera. Perhaps it was God's perfect timing that I should lose the ability to snap pictures just when life became too chaotic for me to...? No temptation there meant more time to do what I was supposed to. :)

Well, now that I've been reunited with my camera I am able to post what I've been up to scrapwise...

Fellow Scrappin' Mama, Carrie, shared a gift card idea for Teacher Appreciation week a while back. I didn't get to it until the very end of the school-year but I did get to it. I found that teachers take notice of craftiness and become expectant.. :/ When I brought this to Riley's teacher with a Starbucks giftcard inside she proclaimed that it was from her favorite place. Score! :)

Not much more scrapping was done because we started into an adventure of getting our house ready to sell. What a pain...having to keep the house clean and ready for last minute phone calls for it to be viewed. Then we started to move to OKC and things got really hectic. Moving in with Brad's parents was an easier transition that I expected but it still wasn't ideal.

The first couple of weeks I was without my scrap supplies and was a little antsy about that so I used my Hobby Lobby gift card to get a few papers, mists and glue and started a page. I cut out my own title and spray-colored it, cut out clouds and in the end this is what I had:

The next weekend we made a trip to Dallas where Brad urged me to grab all of my scrapbook supplies that I needed since I was missing it so much. Oh how I love that guy! Well, later in the week I put this together and added these two cute tags that I found at an LSS in OKC. Let me just say that the shop that I visited was darling. It had lots of great new products from lines that I've been drooling over online. Therefore I will DEFINITELY be making my way back there often!

Well, back to the page..I started by using a flower page that I had punched flowers out of for another page and backed it with one of the first pieces of cardstock that I found in my stash and I really liked it. Then I decided that it might be interesting to sew a little bit on it since I already had my machine out. Then I just played around a little bit and ended up with this quirky page..

This page was inspired by the first challenge in the book 52 More Scrapbooking Challenges by Elizabeth Kartchner. I started with the cuff from a pink button-down shirt that I love.. From there I just used my spray inks and added this and that as I went along. I think the page is fairly inspired by Maggie Holmes' style as well. She is one of my favorite scrapbookers of the moment.

With this one I used some more inspiration from the 52 Challenges book, but very subtly. The author loves using fun colors and patterns so I chose to mix these greens and oranges. I know that my pages can get kind of out-of-hand when I just start putting things on there to fill space, so I just kept it simple and added a touch at a time. I'm sure it could use a little more oomph but for right now I want to keep it the way it is.

My last one was thrown together as a simple white page with elements but I felt it needed a little more so I cut the white down and added blue and yellow cardstock behind it and I think that really helped it. I was happy with the journaling from the beginning so that stayed. It conveys who Riley Danger is at this point in time and I love that!

Sooo, I have apparently been busy scrapping in spite of being in the middle of a big state-to-state move recently. We are still working on getting things from Dallas to OKC, but everyday things are getting sorted out more and I am getting back on some sort of track. The best thing about our move, at least for the next 6 months or so, is that I will have an entire room dedicated to my crafting! I cannot wait to get it set up and get to crafting!!! :)

Crazy Day

2011-07-01T22:37:00.000-07:00

To say that my life is pretty drama-free and dull would be an understatement. I am not one to seek confrontation or craziness. But I do enjoy the occasional day that's filled to the brim with entertaining incidents and they just don't happen often enough.

Today was one of those rare, filled-to-the-brim-with-entertainment days. Let's start with the schedule alone...

Everything seemed to fall into place for me to make a trip halfway across Oklahoma for more than one reason... I got a call earlier this week that my camera was fixed and ready, YIPPEE!! That was just after I had made an appointment for the doctor. Somewhere in there I found out that Meli was having her 4th of July parade at school the same day. I also needed to get Morgan back to her parents, whether they met me somewhere or I just took her back...

Crazily enough everything came together easy-peasy, though I knew that there was a strict time schedule. Meli's parade was first thing in the morning, 9:15. From there Morgan, Riley and I headed off for Tulsa. Enter second most entertaining event of the day...

I'm driving along this Oklahoma turnpike with my Texas tags on my car. There's a dude tailgating me and I end up annoying him. I become confused when I think he's going flip me off and he instead makes a gesture with several of his fingers... It took me a moment to realize that he was giving me the downward Longhorn sign. Bwahahaha! Little did he know that his "offensive" gesture was anything but....what with me being a native Okie myself who takes pride in having attended Oklahoma State! :D

Alright, so I get to Tulsa and am relieved to see that I am 25 minutes ahead of schedule. But wouldn't you know that there is major construction on the very stretch of road right in front of my destination?! Grr. So nerve-racking to be able to see the place where you need to be and you are c.r.a.w.l.i.n.g to get there...and on a time-constraint. :(!

We got there, camera was great. Paid, started to leave, and Riley needed to pee. Now usually I'd just push him behind a bush in a bind like this, but there were no bushes and this was a busy-busy, crowded part of Tulsa. I have dealt with 3-year-old's in this predicament enough to know that nothing is going fix the problem except calmly finding a bathroom and getting it done, so we went to the next shop where Riley had a florist lady fawning over how cute he was. If it was me alone she may have claimed no public bathroom, but 3-year-old mischievous-faced little boys are something else.

Back on the road, made it out of Tulsa in a cinch. Cruised the turnpike back to The Gee without stopping, hopped the highway to Tahlequah. Wouldn't you know that suddenly Morgan needs to pee? Doh! Nothing to do but hit the first convenience store, calmly make a trip inside and get it done. No prob, I have 30 minutes to reach my appointment that's about 30 minutes away...

Alright. So we spend most of the afternoon essentially waiting, waiting, waiting, and being seen by the doctor. Nothing too entertaining there. But had we not spent all that time waiting I may have missed my front-row view of the one-car collision at Burger King. Talk about a doozy.

After visiting the doctor, we were famished, so a BK stop was in store. As I stand outside of my car waiting (and waiting....) for the kids to just get out already, I hear a crazy screech from the highway just in front of me. Suddenly this van comes plowing across grass toward the parking lot, flooring it down the embankment separating the road from BK then bouncing up the opposite side toward us before one wheel jumped the curb and it landed, hissing and sputtering with steam coming out from the hood and it's front tires deflated.

And what do I do as this event unfolds right before my eyes? I just stand there, curiously watching to see how this is going to turn out. Just stood there. I guess I was entertained by something so dramatic happening before me, though not to me. I guess as I watched it happen I knew I didn't have time to move out of the way and with every passing second I knew that it didn't have the momentum to reach us anyway.

I would like to say that I rushed over to help or tried to be of some use, but I simply didn't. Before the kids even finished exiting the car another vehicle had backed up to check on the driver and the situation. I wanted to go on over and do the same, but I had two children and I didn't want them to be left in the parking lot or dragged near a hissing, steaming, busted vehicle. I pulled out my phone to call for help but after seeing several others showing up, I knew that they already had it covered. And so we went inside to eat and peered out the window at the mess of police, fire, ambulance, and tow vehicles that filled the scene.

The rest of the day was pretty low-key. Drove back to Muskogee to take Morgan home, stopped in to Uncle Joey's for a couple hours where we talked about the past and life in general, then moseyed back to OKC with the little guy.

Wore me out, but in a good way. It was a day of action.

2011-06-30T10:28:00.000-07:00

Right now I am listening to Riley and Morgan play while Meli and Kiera are at "school". I'm a little sad that I can't take pictures...but I perk up when I remember that my camera is officially fixed and now I just have to pick it up. That means I'll be driving through Tulsa tomorrow to get it on my way to a doctor appointment. I can't wait!

I am disappointed that Morgan has had a less-than-stellar trip this time... She went to the pool a couple of times with Brad, but was mostly just followed around the house by all the younger kids. I don't know whether she honestly enjoys being the biggest, most awesome kid here or whether she's bored out of her mind. Probably some of both. Maybe Brad and I can make it up to her another time. Maybe a trip to a local waterpark is in store.

It didn't help Morgan's stay that yesterday I spent the day in bed with stomach pains. I think it was a mixture of a stomach bug and dehydration. I chugged down cup after cup of water which seemed to help some. Thankfully nobody else seems to have caught it.

Tomorrow is Morgan's last day here. We will hopefully get to watch Meli and Kiera's 4th of July parade at school before we head off. I don't yet know whether I will drive right back to OKC or stay the night in Muskogee. I might just leave that up to spontaneity. I know that Brad probably won't like that, but that's just the way I like to roll.. :D

Sooo.. Just as a preparation I will say that the next post should be VERY picture heavy since I'll have my camera back! Oh, how I've missed it so!

Meli's first day of "school"

2011-06-24T08:14:00.000-07:00

Today I sent Meli to her first day of school at a summer preschool program at a Methodist church. She walked in like a pro, leaving me behind without a tear or hug. I am so proud to have such an independent, secure girl but couldn't she miss her mama just a smidge? I suppose it didn't hurt that her 5yo cousin is also there and that she's spent years in gym daycare already and hanging around with many cousins.

Like I said, I am just so proud of her. I can't get over her independence. I know she still needs me but she is becoming less dependent by the day and I have no doubt in the world that she is going to grow up into a wonderful person someday, able to take care of herself.

Love my not-so-silly Meli. <3

As a side note, I really need to get my camera fixed to get current pictures of the big events. Hopefully that will happen this weekend.

What I'm reading right now

2011-06-14T13:12:00.000-07:00

The older I get the more I've gained a love for non-fiction, especially reading material regarding human (particularly child) development, psychology, education... I like to learn how the people around me operate and how the ideas and tendencies of society as a whole seem to be shaped.

This is what I've just finished reading. Very interesting and insightful book. It highlighted the over-the-top mentality that our nation has been morphing into at the expense of the health and well-being of adolescents. I have a feeling that I will be rereading this when my children reach middle to high school.

I miss...

2011-06-11T22:39:00.000-07:00

I miss snapping pictures with my camera. At this point, any camera.

I miss scrapbooking. My scrap supplies are living in a different state than me right now, therefore today I used my Hobby Lobby gift card to buy some new ones. Thankfully, Nene has given me some recent pictures of the kids which I can use with my new goodies. :)

I miss having new pictures for my blog, but since I don't, I may as well use an 'oldie'...

Riley, May 2011

I miss having all of my possessions surrounding me to use when I have the urge.

I miss sewing in spite of the fact that I've lugged all of my main supplies to OKC with me. I am just torn between the love I have for it and the work of dragging it out just to immediately put it away.

I miss routine. I am trying to catch hold of a new one right now.

Thankfully, though, I no longer have to miss living near the family and friends that mean the most to me. This also means the kids get to hang more often with the people that mean the most in their world. :)

Created April 2011

Right now

2011-06-09T09:54:00.001-07:00

I am looking up a recipe for banana nut bread. I've eaten it all my life but have yet to make my own loaf. I almost lived off the loaves Aunt Shirley would send back to college with me.

I am still in pajamas at noon, but the kids and I have eaten and done crafts, and read a little and cleaned a little... Maybe I should be getting ready considering I have grand plans to explore OKC this afternoon.

I had to be reminded that today is "El Chico day". We haven't been in over 3 weeks. Wow, we're slipping..

I don't know how many times I've heard songs about monkeys getting snapped out of trees and all rolling over and one falling off.. Oh, and now there's an "Old McDonald had a restaurant.." song, compliments of Papa (and for the record, "Papa's (still) cool!"...especially when he has Oreos and crackers).

I am starting my 3rd non-fiction book in the past month, The Overachievers. I have found that the older I get the more I prefer non-fiction.

I am feeling a little disoriented and unsettled but I have been here before and know that it will take settling into a place and finding a groove to feel better. Thankfully there are family members and friends nearby for support.

I still need to figure out the school arrangements for Meli and Riley. It's a good thing that Brad knows this area. Now I just need to get the technicals out of the way after he establishes a proof of residence for their records.

I hope that I don't have to do anymore driving for a while. I didn't think it would wear on me as much as it has, but I have had about enough for now.

I have joined a new gym, Planet Fitness. I like it but think they take the "No Judgement" motto a little far. They don't even have a scale.. :/

Life keeps moving..

2011-06-07T07:40:00.000-07:00

..and right now I feel like it's tumbling me around. I feel like I'm in a dryer being tossed around this way then that. But that's ok.

Right now I have no camera. It quit working suddenly and hasn't been fixed yet. And although I have been snapping no pictures and have no new images to share, that's alright with me. It's been kind of a relief to just live life for a while without carrying a camera around and rushing to capture so many moments of my life. It's been nice to just relax and live and see things from the present. Don't get me wrong, when I pass my camera, I have a moment of anxiety and want so badly to have it working, but the rational part of me says that I need the break. Not having a camera has been alright because there's so much going on that I don't feel like I have much time for it anyway.

Brad has started at his new job in Moore. He has to wake much earlier than he's used to so we've been changing our sleeping habits (which I am very happy about!). We are living with his parents in OKC to be closer. This includes living with our niece, Kiera, which they care for. It's been interesting and entertaining living here so far. And somehow everyone is getting along swimmingly. The kids are having a great time and all seem to be included and play so well together.

We haven't sold our Dallas home yet, but have had it shown several times. It's a little unsettling to be living between two places. I'm ready to just get the house sold and be able to settle into a new place where we are now. There's no telling how long it will be until we have our own place and are settled in. This time hopefully we will not live in it only with anticipation of eventually selling it. Hopefully we'll actually LIVE in it. I want to paint walls and decorate and make it ours. I want to make more messes and not feel a need to clean, clean, clean all the time. Cleaning up our crafting the minute we're finished, cleaning every teeny tiny spot on the carpet as they appeared, cleaning off counters every time I turned around...

Speaking of moving, my mom just moved as well. To an apartment between Muskogee and Oktaha. I already love it there because it reminds me of my childhood. Looking out the back windows there is a pasture with cows, looking out the front there's a country home. It's on a road we used to take to get to and from "town". In fact, it's so familiar to me that I can look out one of the windows and see my 6th grade teachers home not too far away.

Other than my mom, my IL's are preparing to move also. They have been working on another house, getting it ready to settle into. It's in a calmer area just outside of OKC, in Yukon. Once they move we will be living in their house until we find a new home and theirs will be sold.

I am so happy to be closer to family and friends and so much that is more familiar to my life. In fact, just days before we started staying in OKC, my college friends Jun and Kelli sent me messages about getting together. I really need to get in touch with Kelli. It will be great to already have a friend here to have girl time with.

Sometimes it just all comes together seamlessly...

2011-05-23T15:08:00.001-07:00

I've spent the past week working on a scrapbook page about Riley 'reading' a book..I finally called it 'done!' this morning after fighting with it for so long and moved on...

That's when I threw together this page that took me all of 1 hour. My goodness! Why can't that happen more often?

What's really amazing about the page is that it was based off of a Valentine's Day page...and ended up looking nothing like it! Oh well, when inspiration comes use it in any way you can!

VOLCANO PARTY!! I hope.

2011-05-23T12:19:00.000-07:00

I have determined a party theme for Mr. Smiley-Riley which I think is quite fitting. Tapping into his love of erupting mountains and using inspiration from a bundt-cake which he exclaimed "looks like a volcano!!" I am going to run with the bundt-cake volcano idea.

I have a general idea for invites.. I just have to see if my crafty-skills are up to it.
I, of course, have a general idea for the cake. But once again I have to see if I can make it happen like I envision.

Games? Working on it. I found an idea for "Lava Tug-O-War" which could be a great idea for 4-year-old boys that are all about movement and action. You simply put a red sheet/tablecloth/rug/whatever in between the long rope and play the age-old game of tug-o-war! I also considered letting the kids make mini-volcanoes or mini-"eruptions", which should be pretty simple in and of itself, but throw a bunch of kids into the mix and you never know how it will go!

I have been pretty excited looking up ideas for this, but... it being in August, I may throw all these plans out the window and just hit a local waterpark.

Mama and Her Girls

2011-05-18T17:27:00.000-07:00

Two posts in one day?? I couldn't help it. After getting pictures of all of us girls together, I knew I would need to document it. This is one of those rare experiences and I am so glad that I was able to get this picture. No-one too busy and rushing off. No-one in a horrible mood and just wanting the camera to get out of their face. All of us in the same place at the same time. <3

29 List.

2011-05-18T11:50:00.001-07:00

Not long ago I stumbled upon this, a "28 List" by one of my favorite scrapbookers, Kelly Purkey. Guess what I will be doing in the next couple of weeks while anticipating my next birthday...

I will be forming my own "29 List". I have a couple of things in mind already, but I have no idea how I'm going to figure out 29 items to put on my list. What's reasonable? What's too much of a stretch? Should items actually be a stretch, to get me to experience things I want to but otherwise wouldn't get to? Yes.

I have a feeling there will be more craftiness involved...such as sewing? Scrapping goals? Something altogether new?

Dragging my family to places our feet have never touched? Take my own feet to new places, alone?

I will surely add to the adventure of these two. Will we stick to our own backyard more? Or wander out more often?

Perhaps I'll even learn to just stop, observe and enjoy more of life..

Click, Click, Click!

2011-05-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

To say that I've been obsessed with my new camera the past few days would be an understatement! It has been by my side non-stop...well, when it hasn't been in front of my face. I was almost sad this evening when I had to set it aside to be charged.. :(

Here are some results of my newest obsession:

During an Honor Heights walk with Kate.

In Atoka, along the drive to "The Gee".

Outside play at Mawmaw's.

Playing at "The Northern Cottage".

And this is only a small fraction of the pictures I have snapped thus far!

School on the Brain..

2011-05-16T22:54:00.001-07:00

This sweet little face means so much to me. I have tried very hard to raise her to be polite, independent and intelligent.

She has basically spent her first 5.5 years with me. I have had the privilege of guiding her and, as Brad has mentioned, of surrounding her with our morals and values as opposed to those of someone else.

Soon she will start into the big world of school. I won't constantly be there to hold her hand, instruct her, direct her, witness nearly every moment. I am left wondering if I have done enough or did things right or at least did things alright.

I am about to learn whether my Meli truly is the mature, friendly, polite, independent, smart girl that I believe she is or whether I am biased because she is mine. We are about to enter into the journey of seeing how she stacks up against other kids her age.

I am not afraid of her performance in school. I am not afraid of her interest in school. I am not afraid of her socializing abilities. I am not afraid of what her behavior may be in school. I am really only afraid of one thing at this moment: that I won't know about or be able to put her into the best program possible for her.

This may sound odd, but it stems from my own personal experience. I never want my children to be shortchanged. I never want them to miss out on opportunities because they weren't presented with the options.

Next year Meli starts into school for the first time in her life. We are about to move to an area that I am unfamiliar with and I am at a loss as to the area where she will be, the type of school she may enter, whether we may have an option between multiple schools, etc.

In my life I have learned that you may have an incredibly smart, driven child that thrives despite the school, but the school can make an incredible difference in how they end up and where they go.

At The Beach

2011-05-15T09:26:00.001-07:00

Last weekend we made a little trip down to the Corpus Christi, South Padre and Port Aransas area. It was fun, though definitely not long enough. I experienced a lot of things that I've never experienced before, which is a good thing.

The first day we spent time on the beach at Corpus Christi because that was where we were staying. We took Riley toward the USS Lexington so that he could see the "enormous boat!" We collected seashells as we wandered along toward it and we avoided the jabillion jellyfish that littered the shore. At a seemingly jellyfish-free spot we hopped in the water to play...and that's when Meli and Brad experienced a jellyfish sting for the first time in their lives. :(

We quickly became accustomed to sand covering our feet. Well, everybody but Riley did.

Later in the day we journeyed along South Padre and came upon the national park. The beaches were much better (generally due to no jellyfish and finer sand).

And from here, my camera gave up on me.. I think the sand got to it. :( I do have more pictures to post, but will have to get them from Brad's phone. As a quick description of the rest of our vacation:

Leaving South Padre, we experienced the ferry at Port Aransas to get back to mainland. We did this several more times over the next couple of days.
The next day, Sunday, which was Mother's Day we ventured to Port Aransas where we drove around a bit then boogie-boarded in the waves. Awesome way to spend Mom Day, IMHO. The kids were unsure of the unruly waves and mostly stayed ashore, playing in the sand. I have no doubt that as they get older and braver, the water will become their beach preference. As night set in, we made our way to the pier which took my breath away...the enormous waves and never-ending water were something that I've never seen before.
We were going to leave Sunday, but postponed it another day. Then we headed back to Port Aransas where we rented a buggy to putter around the town and along the beach. Our first stop was a marina to watch dolphins leaping through the water in front of a cargo ship's bow. Then we headed to the beach area and walked along rocks heading out into the water. I felt young and adventurous again as I walked along the rocks closest to the crashing waves, letting them wash over my feet in a hurry. I kept holding my breath, afraid that they were going to sweep me away. After returning the buggy, we returned to the beach and enjoyed hours of fun in the sand and water before riding off into the sunset toward home.

New Toy

2011-05-13T23:33:00.001-07:00

Well, it's finally happened. After drooling over so many pictures on scrapbook pages and blogs around the internet I have finally upgraded to an SLR and I couldn't be happier (note photo above!)! Next step: figure out how to use all these settings! I felt I had come a long way with my Canon Powershot which recently bit the dust, but now I have a whole new machine to work with. I can't wait to absorb every little tip and trick that I can. Just today I figured out how to shoot in tungsten light. Those pictures are unavailable at the moment, but below are some of those first few shots that I caught within the first few hours of playing. :D

Amelia

2011-04-21T14:38:00.000-07:00

This picture says a lot about my Silly Amelia. She is growing up so much more everyday and becoming more and more of her own little person. She wishes she was super-sassy and nothing but a girly-girl, but that's really not the case...she's far too sweet to be very sassy. And she loves playing anything boyish with her little brother which means she's not near as girly as she thinks. Don't get me wrong, she is definitely not a tomboy. Dresses are her #1 outfit of choice and she wears them 6 days out of 7. The more shimmery and frilly the better! She is also very carefree with her choices of patterns and colors, mixing and matching anything and everything.

I used to have a problem with her shading her face for pictures, now she has become a major ham. I have no idea where the recent diva moves have come from. She isn't getting them from me; I am still shy and self-conscious.

Aside from the posing diva acts, she still has a lot of interest in the same things as before. She has been anxious to start school for the past 2-3 years and is still itching to get there. I think it has to do with seeing all of her cousins going and being curious about what they do there. She already loves all of the activities that she would be doing at school--listening to stories, crafts and coloring and cutting with scissors, puzzles, computer learning games, singing songs, etc. I think the best part of school for Meli, the part that she feels she's lacking at home, is the social aspect. I don't know how she will actually do when she gets there, but so far she has proven to do well. She starts social interactions by sitting back, observing. Then when she finally approaches the other child, she suddenly opens up and starts having fun and it's all great from there.

Aside from interests in school and all that goes with it, Meli loves singing and DANCING. She gets very serious about her dancing, to the point of closing her eyes and swaying around, arms making broad sweeps through the air. We have never registered her in a dance or gymnastics class, but she has 'visited' a few. I am always weary before, because I know that the other kids in the class have likely been taking these classes for a year or two already and Meli will stick out like a sore thumb...but I am surprised each time because she does just fine, not awkward at all. It's probably because they're still young. I am just glad that my little girl is not clumsy and does just fine.

Alright, a few facts about my sweet little Silly Amelia as she is right now:

She is now writing "AMELIA ANNE BL" without any help or prompting. Whether she can write the rest without any help I don't know. (I just came across this today.)
She is counting to 100 with help at 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80 and 90.
She has great concentration and reading comprehension, sitting patiently listening to me read chapter books like Charlotte's Web.
She has specific kids songs that she loves--"Down By the Sea" in particular.
I recently witnessed her socializing with another girl, laughing and giggling about their favorite parts in Tangled--Meli's was when Pascal sticks his tongue in Flint's ear. I was very proud that she is pretty good at relating with others.
She still feels incomplete without Riley at her side. She spent a few days away from Riley and was really missing him, asking about him and wanting to chat with him on the phone. (He did the same..)
She loves the movie "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs" and her favorite part is when Baby Brent turns into Chicken Brent and beats up the other chickens. #2 is the part when the gummy bears are attacking the plane and the monkey eats them.
She's still into Dora, though we haven't caught the show recently.
She still loves playing on NickJr.com and recently learned how to get onto the internet and find the site on her own.
She generally doesn't like fruits, especially strawberries, but still likes vegetables like green beans and broccoli.
She loves to eat raw vegetables with ranch, cottage cheese, 'crunchies' (croutons).
She loves the songs "Surfin' Bird (Bird is the Word)" and "Black Betty" on Brad's iPhone and crazy dances to them while in the car.
She still loves the colors pink and purple but has added light blue, white, red and orange to the list.
She is constantly coming to tell me new rhyming words that she's caught.
She is learning the sign, meaning and spelling of 'yield' right now and trying to find those signs while we drive.
She loves Barbie and Strawberry Shortcake movies.
She has taken an interest in God and church lately and I've even caught her watching religious cartoons on TV.
She is a little bossy toward Riley which makes me think that she's caught the bossy-bug from me. :(
She has started using her swingset as a monkey-bar and can move across to the 'merry-go-round' part and slide down the pole.
She re-enacts the complex sentences, songs and actions she sees/hears on TV and the radio.
She loves for her bed to made, but won't do it for herself.
She loves being around her Aunt Heidi, though she was afraid of her for the first couple of years of her life! Outgoing Aunt Heidi makes her act even quieter, though.
She is very anxious to move back to OK to be closer to all of her family and constantly rambles off all the people she can't wait to see more often.
She loves the library and is open to any books that are placed in front of her, though she's partial to Strawberry Shortcake, Fancy Nancy, Barbie and Dora.
She loves to sleep in her sleeping bag on the floor sometimes. Doesn't happen every night, but here and there.
She surprised me this morning by being in bed between me and Brad when I woke and saying "SURPRISE!".
^^ She is such a cuddle-bug, though only on her own terms, when and for how long she wants.
She is learning to sound out simple words, but she has some reluctance. I think she has some uncertainty and fear of failure. I need to figure out how to help her get past that.
She has become a bit more weary of her artistic abilities. While drawing pictures of Dada with chalk with me, she become upset that her picture didn't come out the way she wanted. I don't think she understands the concept of "practice makes perfect" yet.
She was slow to show her excitement and enthusiasm the past couple of years until just recently. She seemed to have delayed reactions, but has recently opened up and acts excited about the littlest things!
She loves any kid CD that's popped into the player and she loves when the two of us jam in the car before picking up Riley from school.
She

Riley

2011-04-21T11:13:00.000-07:00

The past couple of days I have noticed and learned about patterns in Riley's interests, abilities and things he needs to work on.

Yesterday during a trip to the Museum of Nature and Science, I noticed that he was drawn to a machine that electronically moves ping-pong balls with levers and ramps. This reminded me of a larger, more complicated one that he was mesmerized by when we went to the children's museum with Nene. Then there was the instance at the Science Museum in OKC, where he was able to make his own mechanism with pegs and ramps to make balls roll down into a basket (pictured above). Yesterday he had an opportunity to drop balls into holes on a floor and see them roll to the end and exit through a trapdoor. He would have stayed there for an hour if I would have let him. Later we found an exhibit with a balancing ring on a wire moving back and forth and once again his eyes were glued to it trying to figure out how it was doing that.

Now, not to get ahead of myself, but from my understanding these are interests that are generally possessed by engineers and physicists. Whether he grows up wanting to study these fields or not, I will encourage him to be the best that he can at anything he wants to pursue, within reason. :) I just hope that he will recognize strengths and true interests as factors in his choice, and I believe his interest in the physical world and the way it works is a strong one.

Just as I take note of interests and/or strengths, that doesn't mean that I should let the weaknesses slide. I want him to be the best he can in every aspect, and to be well-rounded. Today I was reminded of one of his biggest weaknesses, one which I share and perhaps have passed along to him: poor socialization skills. I am introverted and prefer to spend a lot of time alone. Riley doesn't seem to want to spend a lot of time alone, he would rather have Meli or me around. But if Meli and I aren't present he'll opt for alone. He is observant of other kids, but he doesn't approach them. If they approach him, he steps back and partially turns away, giving them a tiny chance to prove they're safe or fun. From there he opens up but slowly.

His socialization skills came into account today when we went to his ARD meeting for SmallTALK. One of our focuses for the next year will be expression + communication with others. He has no issue expressing and communicating with us in his immediate family, but is not very open to others. Perhaps this year I can find some great ways to combat this, to open his willingness to speak to others and make new friends more easily. He's not unfriendly, he just takes time.

Puzzles were also mentioned offhand at the meeting. Of all the toys, I was told he prefers them. I am glad to hear that and I take some credit for it. I introduced puzzles fairly early and I have made a habit of giving them for birthdays and Christmases. I don't know precisely the brain benefits of them, but I think they help with spatial reasoning and I believe both this and his interest in the moving physical world stem from the same region of the brain.

Other than these things, here are some tidbits about him now:

He knows most of the letters, likes to sing the alphabet with a few problem spots, and recognizes his name. He can write about half of his name.
He can count to 12 on his own, unless he slows or gets sidetracked, and he can recognize all the single numbers plus a few double digits. He even identified "22" yesterday when I randomly asked Meli what the number was.
He knows all general colors and his favorites are green, blue and yellow.
He knows the shapes, including 'diamond' and 'crescent'.
He loves to put puzzles together and some age 3 puzzles grow too easy for him fairly quickly.
He climbs on, through, under everything. I cannot keep things away any longer by placing them on the fridge. Earlier this week I caught him in a tree in the backyard.
He not only still wants to dress himself, he now has to okay the clothes that are chosen.
He has a great attention span, with the ability to sit quietly listening to multiple books in succession.
He loves to paint. His favorite part is mixing the colors to make new ones.
He still loves cars and anything that moves.
He likes to dance and his favorite seems to be the one we've dubbed the "Crazy, Lazy Arm Dance". He lets his arms dangle while he turns from side to side, bobbing his head. :D
He loves shirts and jackets with hoods, which he pulls over his head the entire time he's wearing them. I think this is an attempt to 'hide' from others. Kind of like "Frankenstein" and his invisibility glasses in the movie Big Daddy.
He loves the word "poop" and makes jokes out of it, laughing hysterically. :(
He loves Bumblebee the Transformer, Spiderman, Batman, Ironman and Superman, though he doesn't have the attention for the lifelike movies.
He loves the book "Larry Gets Lost in Texas" and wants to see the Texas Star ferris wheel over and over.
He's still addicted to the movie CARS, but prefers Mater and The King to 'Ka-Chow'. And sometimes he prefers "Mater's Tall Tales" to the CARS movie.
He has taken a liking to the stuffed dog Aunt Shirley gave me at about his age. He likes to wrap a jump-rope around it's neck and pretend to pull it around the house on a 'leash'.
He likes water without ice, which he refers to as "train-water". I have no idea where he got that name for it.
He had to give up his monster truck rally yesterday but was a big boy about it. He told it 'good-bye' with a wavering lip, but then let it go without a problem.
He has been wanting his "brown dresser" back, the shorter one that matched his baby crib. When asked why he said he wanted to jump off of it. His new one is too tall.
He loves to take "rain walks", splashing in smaller puddles and finding gooey mud to wiggle his feet in.
He wants to eat chicken nuggets with BBQ sauce at every meal.
He still gets excited about going to El Chico, though we've done it once a week nearly every week for the past few years. I am very happy that he likes salsa with his chips.
He is the pickiest little eater I've ever seen, except for breakfast foods, fruits, chicken and pizza.
He talks about being a grown up by saying, "When I'm a big daddy, ...." I think this means he looks forward to being big like his daddy and he thinks you're just automatically a dad at that point.
He's very good with dogs and cats, easing up to them carefully and calmly and petting them very gently. He also tries to feed them with whatever food he has around.
He is fairly calm for a 3yo boy, but I notice that he does have boy behavior waiting to pour out at any given second. He is more restless than Meli, and sometimes more difficult to 'wrangle'. He's more physical and flighty. He loves to wrestle and pretend fight if others want to. Sometimes when he gets angry he snarls his upper lip and shows his fists as though he wants to hit or is about to, but they seem to be more for show...he rarely follows through and it's always toward Meli, never toward me or Brad.
He considers me his "best buddy" and randomly tells me he loves me. He loves to snuggle into my lap and to be held, but only on his own terms.
He still has an interest in volcanoes and points out if other objects look anything like one. On a magazine he noted how the bundt cake with poured icing and red/purple berries on top looked like one.
He loves to help me in the kitchen. He pours in ingredients and/or stirs them. He also gets things out of the fridge for me.
He still doesn't love school, but he loves snack-time. Each day, he's excited to tell me what they had to eat.
He takes an interest in Meli's toys, but uses them in boyish ways. For example, he used her Barbie airport as a ramp system for his monster trucks.

Trying Something New

2011-04-01T13:56:00.001-07:00

I'm usually not up for trying out the latest trend. I try not to get caught up in what everyone else is doing at the moment. But, I have been seeing fanned flowers all over the place and they've tickled my fancy. I love that they're so simple and cheap yet pack a big punch. So I tried it..and loved it. I see many more in my future.

Although I loved these flowers, I didn't think I would ever take the time to learn to make my own. Story of my scrapbooking life. But lately push-came-to-shove and I needed something already on hand to fill the empty block in my collage. This was just right.

PUMPKIN PAINTING

2011-03-21T22:51:00.000-07:00

Very interesting day yesterday..

I met up with an old friend. Nevermind that I went to her parent's house to visit her sister and she just so happened to be there. We spent an hour or so chatting about anything and everything, then made plans for our little families to go out to dinner together which led to visiting her house until nearly midnight. I had a great time! I didn't realize that I missed her so much and I had forgotten how well we connect (for the most part..). I was very amazed that our husbands got along so well. Similar personalities in spite of much different interests. They even invited us back before we head back home to Texas. I would love to, but I'm afraid of wearing out our welcome too soon... :/

New Scrappy Stuff

2011-03-17T20:45:00.001-07:00

Just sharing some scrappy goodness that I've done. I've put myself on a spending restriction lately..I've gotta get rid of some of this stash I've acquired before I can feel 'right' about more shopping.

Due to my restriction I'm feeling anxious to throw pages together, so I must admit there are some pages that I am with-holding. I am going through a creative, daring stage where I am trying different styles and techniques here and there and they don't always come out so pretty.

coloRing

junNie

R&a

Be Daring

So there we have it. Hopefully this scrapbooking mojo will hang around for a while!

Today.

2011-03-15T17:32:00.000-07:00

Today I tried a new "look"--boots with a flowy skirt-- while Brad showed off his dorky "look"--socks and sandals.

Today I found the trick to a cute picture with him--distract him with something that makes him laugh. Today, that just so happened to be "D*** you, Auto-correct!"

Today I rushed to the library with Riley--there was just enough time to return 20 books and find a few movies, Rocky and Rambo included. I still can't believe Brad has never seen either! :-O

Today I am watching my 2 currently favorite shows--Biggest Loser and My Life As Liz.

Today I am missing my Meli b/c she's visiting Nene and Papa for the week. That started off a little rocky, but I'm sure she's settled and having a blast now..

Today I am trying to convince myself to get back to the gym..I haven't ran in almost a week. :-(

Today flew by too fast. My sleeping is out-of-whack, meaning I went to bed late and thus woke late. Gotta get that fixed.

Today I've avoided working on housework like I should. Not good considering we have a playdate with Suzanne and Kairi in the morning.

Today I am spending too much time on the computer. At least I got my scrapbook pages edited and uploaded to facebook. Did I mention I spent too much time on facebook in particular..? Pretend I didn't mention that... :-)

Thankfully, the Last Night!

2011-03-14T00:32:00.000-07:00

Independent. At one time that is what I was.

I wanted and loved to be all on my own.
I did my own thing and didn't need to worry about anyone else.
I went just about everywhere on my own.
I had a favorite quote from Peewee's Big Adventure that I jokingly used often: "I'm a loner, Dottie."

Tonight I'm thinking of all of this because I don't feel very independent.
Even in spite of being on my own, taking care of Riley by myself for 5 days & 4 nights.
I have been a wreck. It took me 3 nights to feel brave enough to sleep before daybreak...by night 4 my sleeping was so out of whack that I couldn't.. :(

I'm missing my B-Rad. BAD.
I'm missing hearing him out in the garage. We may spend a lot of time in separate parts of the house, but it's comforting to know there's nothing but a wall between us.
I miss snuggling up to him as we go to bed. Even if I turn away only moments later.
Most of all, I miss joking, laughing and talking with him. Just being with him.

Thankfully, he'll be coming back in 12 hours. Only 12 hours!

No Real Kisses

2011-03-10T23:04:00.000-08:00

Well, it's official.. my "baby" has gotten too big for me.. :(

3-and-a-half and he's decided that he doesn't want kisses from me anymore. No lips on face. And as any love-filled mom would do, I've continued to go in for a peck on the forehead or cheek only to have him remind me "No. more. real. kisses. Mommy." as he wipes the cooties away. :(

I knew this day would come, I just didn't expect it so soon.

2011-02-03T01:32:00.000-08:00

Lately, my heart has been yearning to do something big and challenging. I feel that an idea has been growing for a few years, but I am just now allowing it to be a possibility. I am afraid and part of me wants to cover my eyes and run the other direction. The other part of me, a bigger part of me, wants to listen to my heart and dive right into my heart's desire.

We are considering opening a local scrapbook store.

I am still torn and trying to weigh the pros and cons. And honestly, I am trying to talk myself out of even considering it, but my heart won't let me. I am afraid of the little that I know about taking on such an endeavor. But at the same time, I keep thinking of the things that would work for me, the few things that I do know. My head keeps telling me that it's a big risk and that I am not a big risk-taker. But it is being drowned out by my heart telling me that it wants me to use my head to learn as much as I can about location, products, pricing, marketing, business licensing, and all of the other things that will get me as prepared as possible instead of listening to my head try to talk me out of it.

So I keep moving forward. I send emails to vendors, I visit product websites, I pore over the SBA website.. I google, google, google.. I tell myself that there's no harm or cost in asking questions or seeking answers. I tell myself that it doesn't hurt to inquire about leasing costs or to drive around searching for a "dream location" for a store. I wonder about what people I could possibly recruit for their knowledge or assistance.

I don't have to convince myself that this is not something to take lightly. I don't have to ask myself if I'm too naive. I know that I have no idea what it takes. I know that this would take more out of me than I could imagine. I am trying to brace myself as best I can, just in case we go through with it. The best I can do is read, ask questions and learn, then go for it.

ETA: No LSS for me. We are moving back to Oklahoma. Perhaps there may come a day in years to come where I see it happening, but it isn't in the cards at this point. Honestly, I've heaved a big sigh or relief...the idea of running my own business was scaring me. In a good way.

Hello, Mojo!

2011-01-12T11:15:00.000-08:00

I am feeling inspired to scrapbook again...and it feels great! I am feeling so great, in fact, that I whipped up a page just this morning! That's an accomplishment for me because most of my pages take me several days no matter how simple they are. Here are the pages that I have completed recently:

Wow, I really hope this continues! And I also hope I can meet the challenge that Brad and I agreed to last night. The holidays left me with a little extra weight so he agreed that if i can lose a certain amount by my birthday I can buy a new Photoshop. Maybe I'll make it and then I can find other deals to negotiate...I've also been thinking that a photo-printer and better camera would be awfully handy...

Learning about lighting..

2011-01-10T11:42:00.000-08:00

Today I decided to look for tips for using my little point-and-shoot camera. A p&s is the only camera I have and many of my photos leave me feeling blah. While browsing, there was one topic that really hit home with me: shooting in dark spaces. After reading about holding a business card in front of the flash but needing a low white ceiling or something else to bounce it back forward, I decided to make my very own little contraption...

Here are some of the results of my experimentation:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

I am pleasantly surprised with the difference! It shows the spaces and the subjects/objects colors more true-to-life and fills the rest of the space pretty well.

Big Project...

2010-10-10T18:28:00.001-07:00

This year I am being brave.

As I was surfing 2peas a few days ago, I came upon a link to this. Last year I was so enamored by this idea, but knew that I didn't have the patience to create my own. I swooned over Ali Edwards' and Jamie's albums. They were both fantastic and very inspiring! After only a few days of seeing Jamie's documentation, I wished that I had tried this project myself.

This year I am going for it. I feel a little lost at present and I am afraid that it won't come out well (I have issues with either not keeping a consistency or with making everything too uniform). I looked back through Jamie's and couldn't help feeling a bit nervous--she has such a wonderfully clean style while mine tends to lean toward "messy". My... I guess the only thing I can do is dive in. Please wish me luck that the outcome is not as bad as I dread.

ETA: With all of this worry-talk I forgot to mention that I'm torn between what I want to use for the cover. I started with the idea for the chipboard 'scraps' + ring on the right then remembered I had stashed a red 8x8 album. See what I mean? I just started and I'm already uncertain of where to go with it...

My Decorating Style

2010-02-04T09:15:00.000-08:00

While websurfing this morning I was led to this quiz about finding out what your home decorating style is. Below are my results..to be totally honest, these are the designs that appeal to me but not really what I could manage in my own home. Just seeing these inspiring rooms is enough for me, though. :)

38% Contemporary

38% Vintage Modern

24% Rustic Revival

2010-01-30T20:44:00.000-08:00

Was just blog-hopping (here) when I came across this cute little cartoon.. Describes my situation perfectly considering I currently have a 4yo and a 2yo!

I've started using sketches.

2010-01-15T12:43:00.000-08:00

Last month, while blog-hopping I came across a blog that really appealed to me... The Scrappiest.
I really had fun with the sketches that were posted! I posted my LO's based on the sketches below. I'm hoping to get back to scrapping soon so that I can try out the sketches that have been posted this month. There's an awesome kit from Studio Calico up for grabs to the winner of this month's challenge. I'm still fairly new so I'm not sure if I will enter the challenge, though I would looove the kit!

Cool Kids

Little Drummer Boy

A is for Awesome

2010-01-08T18:34:00.000-08:00

I'm joining my first BlogHop! Pretty exciting...and means I will find the inspiration of even more amazing designers and their beautiful LO's! Here's an invitation for all to join me! :D

MeMe Award..better late than never?

2009-12-14T18:18:00.000-08:00

Quite a while back my friend, Vicky Jo, added me as one of the recipients of this award. I have been seriously lacking here and of course didn't get to it until just now, but I am determined to get to it first thing now that I am back around...

The rules are that I have to come up with five categories and then list five things in each and then I have to pass it out to five other bloggers. So, here goes...

5 favorite hobbies:

:: bargain-hunting
:: random blog-hopping
:: reading
:: jogging
:: scrapbooking

5 favorite stores:

:: Hobby Lobby
:: Half-Price Books
:: Michaels
:: Old Navy
:: The Childrens Place

5 things I probably say the most (!):

:: "C'mon!"
:: "Don't do that."
:: "Stay out of there!"
:: "Leave that alone."
:: "Love you.."

(One compound-word can sum those all up...stay-at-home-mom!)

5 things I want to accomplish this year:

:: finish a 10k in under an hour (I've been aspiring to this for a long time now, but haven't mustered the motivation and determination to get it done...)
:: bowl a 200+ game..I'm so close, I've had a 189 game..
:: join a scrapbooking group in my area
:: visit more local sites
:: learn to organize my time better

5 real-life friends I'm immeasurably thankful for:

:: Brad
:: Miyoung
:: Jun
:: Cassie N.
:: Katie C.

Alright, so now I have to pass it on to 5 others...I'm not sure I have that many! Here goes...

:: Aimee
:: Cassie
:: Carrie
:: Jamie
:: Julie

Christmas Cards

2009-12-03T11:33:00.000-08:00

Jumping on to share some cards that I made for the holidays. I had a lot of fun with them and was surprised by how simple and quick they were to make! Most were made using the My Mind's Eye Wonderful Winter glittered paper pack. Including the snowmen, trees and multi-colored 'stars' which I cut out of the paper and added using pop-dots.

Bad Pictures! How Do I Fix That Problem?!

2009-11-25T18:51:00.000-08:00

The more I look at pictures of my LO's the more discouraged I become.. I am happy enough with the majority of my LO's, but I've found that I hate-hate-hate pretty much ALL of the pics that I've taken of them... *pout*. I've been trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong, but I'm still not getting it. They're blurry and/or they have bad lighting. But even when I took a couple of LO's outside mid-afternoon today and tried to photograph them in the shade, they came out way too dark :(. Should I try snapping them in the open sun? Guess I'll just have to try and see..

My Girly Day and Some LO's

2009-11-23T11:56:00.001-08:00

I am definitely more of a tomboy than a girly-girl...but every once in awhile even I want to let a little of my girly side out. I was so proud of myself for making it a full day in a skirt yesterday! My in-laws came to visit and I figured it would be worthwhile to kick up my appearance a few notches..plus I was anxious to try out this new flowy, flowery skirt...

I will admit that more often than being a tomboy, I take on the persona/look of a schoolmarm...I love these little shoes!

And here are some of my latest LO's...

One about my niece, Morgan. I had LOTS of fun on this one, was carefree. Not much to the LO, wish it would have POPPED more, but I did enjoy the process and final product! (Sorry for the blurry pic...)

My favorite part of the page...the 3 squares stapled on.

Just something I did for a little fun...I chopped off the corners, then decided to staple some new pp's on in their places.

The Boys & The Girls
A very minimal LO with pics of my little family having fun.

Weird angle..blogspot keeps rotating it and I'm unwilling to fight it today!

So much to post but I'll save it for another time! :)

2009-11-20T13:48:00.000-08:00

Alright...I now want a typewriter.. This is why....

I remember having one as a teenager...bought it from my aunt's secondhand shop for a couple of dollars. Oh, how I loved it!

Just a few holiday cards..

2009-11-20T10:41:00.000-08:00

Just a few of the holiday cards that I made last month. I've since made a couple more, not to mention a couple of b-day cards and a simple chipboard ornament..I'll get those posted as soon as I get all of them uploaded to my computer. Oh, yeah--plus a few more LO's I've made recently.

On another note, in the past year and a half that I've been scrappin' I've never ventured far past my Scrappin' Mamas. I've been content to leisurely scrap a couple of LO's here or there and post them to the group, but now I want to expand my reach. I want to start entering challenges, maybe find some crops, join classes..meet more scrappers and learn more, have more feedback.

Scrap!

2009-11-19T23:44:00.000-08:00

I'm considering giving this blog a MUCH bigger role within the next couple of months. My 365 Journey was my original blog, it had a purpose. This blog was just going to be my blog to turn to every once in awhile when I wanted to ramble a little..let out my thoughts and feelings, to cheer or rant, to link to things that I liked and never wanted to forget or things to some day inspire me when I happened upon them again...

Well, I think the days of neglecting this blog are over! I want to add to this blog..I want to include my enjoyment of scrapping! I want to document nearly everyday in more than just a picture and a couple of lines of journaling (though I may continue that on my other blog even into next year). I want to join in on the online scrapbooking community..

So here is my first official post dedicated to 'scrap' :D

This is a layout about my preschooler's bedtime routine--I wanted to be sure that I never forgot the massive number of steps, their sequence and how many of each!!!

This layout was my attempt at layering..I haven't practiced this style much, so I get antsy about how it will turn out.

I had been stuck in a bit of a creativity rut and didn't know what to scrap or how I wanted to scrap it..so I dug out these pics, forced myself to open my (first ever) BasicGrey paper-pack and just take it a step at a time..I was happy with the outcome!

This is a bit more like my usual scrap-style..there are definitely things I do and DON'T like about this page..

iNHiBiTiON!

2009-11-16T15:14:00.000-08:00

i will admit it..i have a LOT of it. lately i've found that it's even bad in my scrapbooking. i want so badly to have fabulously awesome unique pages that scream LOOK AT ME AND BE AWED!!! i don't really care if no one else likes them...all i know is that as a whole, i don't think I like my pages.. i see so much possibility, such good initial ideas and approaches, but there's always some point along the way where iNHiBiTiON got in the way and took it in the wrong direction.. i want to just let go, get some complete mess, go with it. slap down some paint or go crazy with uneven pen lines...jot down a quick line or two that says everything. i am already scatterbrained, i already love to trim my papers with scissors for the messy cuts and take the same approach with my pen lines. but there is still something that is held back...

Hectic month ahead...!

2009-11-04T14:46:00.000-08:00

I'll be back in the next few days to document what we've been up to lately, but for now I'm going to try to list all the little projects and goals I've made for myself for the month of November so that I can try to wrap my head around it...

:: Last month I really slacked on working out :(. We made 3 trips out-of-state and we had overnight visitors...it was just a very busy month! Therefore, I am demanding quite a bit from myself this month. Too bad I told Brad about my plan--he's already holding me to it! I have decided to run EACH DAY for this entire month!!! It doesn't matter if it's a 5-miler on the treadmill or 1/2 mile in our neighborhood, if it's 9 mph sprints or a 5 mph shuffle-along. I just have to do some running everyday. And I already missed yesterday (isn't that pathetic?!) so the penalty is that I have to run 2 times today...sounds alright to me :)

:: I decided to be brave and attempt 20 cards and 3 LO's for my scrapbooking goals. If you know me, you know that lately it takes me an entire month just to finish 3 LO's. I'm hoping to really get into the holiday spirit and whip out some cards..they're a lot quicker than LO's if you just 'lift' and/or reproduce the same card over and over...if it comes to that, that's what I'll do! :D

:: I have to finish preparing Morgan's and Meli's b-day party! I have made some goodie-bags, but still have about 10+ more to make. Their party is less than 2 weeks away, on the 14th...which reminds me, I need to call my sister and see if she's booked the skating rink!!

:: I need to catch "Brooklyn's mom" at the gym and our neighbors Miss Tara, Kyle and Lacy to see if they'd like to eat lunch at McDonalds on Meli's actual birthday.. I was going to have a party at our house, but I don't see the point of giving Meli TWO parties, 1 big one in Oklahoma, 1 very small one in Texas.. plus, Meli's b-day theme is 'My Little Pony' and right now they're in the Happy Meals!! So, I'm thinking just a 'special' little lunch at a place kids love where we rarely go.

:: I want to catch up on my Project365 blog. I've considered editing all of the pics I've taken this past year (the ones I feel could really use it) but could you imagine all the time that would take?! That would probably take an entire month in and of itself! I promise myself, I will edit the photos, but I don't promise that it will be done this year!! For now I'm just focusing on uploading the rest of the pics to date.

Alright, so this is some of the *stuff* I need/want/will do this month! Wish me luck!

Telling it like it is.

2009-08-05T04:45:00.000-07:00

I was surfing around this morning when I came upon this comment on a weight-loss journey blog. IMHO, this woman did an amazing job of telling it like it is and being motivational...I'm revved-up!!

Savy said...

Ok, I'm going tough cookie on you - so take it with love.

If people quit because something was hard, no one would do anything worthwhile. So what if it was hard today! It won't be as hard tomorrow, or maybe it will be - but will it make it any less worth it?

You got out there today, and you walked. THAT is the point. It was hard? GOOD! Because if it was easy, would you really care? Seriously? What the heck would be the point if it was easy?

Now tomorrow, make it harder. Stop beating up on yourself because it's a total waste of your energy. You're mad at yourself because it wasn't easy? How silly is that? Instead put the anger where it belongs. Go kick that workout's butt.

If there is one thing that every person should know about exercise, it is that you have to want it. I don't mean want it like you do a cupcake or a nice necklace for Christmas. I mean, you have to want that darn workout. Your OWN MIND wants to take it away from you, and it's in partnership with your body.

Excuse my language, but LIKE HELL! Don't let yourself do that. This is yours, it is for you, and NO ONE - not even yourself - is going to take it away from you. Be agressive and get what you want. Don't let your body sidetrack your intentions by saying "here, beat up on my feelings and self value, then you won't walk and you'll feel hopeless and we won't do anything healthy and feel even worse!"

You are your own worst enemy. I am my own. You have to get AGGRESSIVE with YOURSELF. Don't think of it as pushing yourself, think of it as fighting back. This is a tug-o-war between that nasty evil being that likes to hurt you, and who you are MEANT to be. Don't you dare give up and let that little snot who likes to tell you how bad you are win.

Don't even let that other you speak. Get the duct tape, gag the bugger, grit your teeth, growl at it, and kick butt. This is about you for you, and there is nothing else beyond that.

December 17, 2007 4:27 PM

You Right Now: Riley

2009-07-20T09:49:00.001-07:00

:: You are a mischievous little guy who knows when to smile to melt his Mama's heart and get away with trouble!

:: You are still not much of a talker. Here are some of the words/phrases I listed at 21 months:

Mama, mil-mil, moo-moo, maw-maw, your car?, car, red car, race car, go-kart, football!, ball,
golfball, basketball/baseball (not clearly, and sound alike), graham cracker, nana (banana),
yum-yum, thank you, please, hi, look at... (this? that?), whoa!, want to go, uh-huh, no, uh-oh!,
moo, quack, duck, elephant, circle, one, juice.

I'm sure there are a few more now, but still not many...

:: You love to color although you lose interest quickly unless Meli is coloring with you.

:: When there are several kids/people around you like to wander off and play completely alone.
You seem to like to explore on your own.

:: You climb pretty well, but don't do it a lot. Unless it's on your kiddie table!

:: You're still taking a nap every afternoon. They usually last 2-3 hours.

:: You are now in a 'big-boy bed'. You transitioned without any problems and you rarely climb
out when you aren't supposed to. You've filled half the bed with trucks, cars, balls and other
miscellaneous toys. I guess thats what keeps you in there! :D

:: You love being outside. Anytime the door is pulled open, you come running!

:: You aren't very sure of swimming or sprinklers, but you love baths. Especially with bubbles--what kid doesn't?!

You Right Now: Meli

2009-07-17T15:20:00.001-07:00

:: Right now you love pink and usually chose that color when given choices. Yet, when asked what color you like best, you name every one that you can think of.

:: You memorized the alphabet song just after Christmas and can now point out a significant number of letters visually and state words that start with that letter:

"A is for Amelia and Apple!"
"B is for Brad"
"D is for Dada!"
"E is for Emma...and Elephant"
"F is for Frog.."
"What is that?" (I say "H..") "H is for Heidi!!"
"Little-I has an 'eye'." (Very matter-of-factly.)
"L...is for..Lane?"
"M is for Morgan!!"
"O! O is for Octopus and Owl!"
"R is for Riley. Right, Mama?"
"S is for Snake and Stephanie."
"That's a Z for Ze-BRAAA!!"

:: You can also write your entire name when you're in the mood. As you write it you say it out loud: "Big-A, m, e, l, i-with-an-eye, and little-a...AMELIA!"

:: Here you are reciting how to spell your name...

:: You can count from 1-11, though every once in awhile you get ahead of yourself or confused and forget a number or two. You will keep counting with me to 20 if you're in the mood.

:: You recognize some written numbers: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. You argue with me about 10 because you don't understand the concept of 2 numbers together yet! :D

:: You love to sing songs, and the ones you sing the most are ones that you made up on the spot; my favorite was a recent one in the car. Riley was unhappy and you started singing to him telling him, "It's aaallright, Buuub..alright, Bub..." so calmly and sweetly.

:: You also love to dance and you have some 'mad moves'! Just like singing, you'll make up your own dances and even give them names!!

:: Just like last year at this time, you love to randomly go swimming or through the sprinkler, so we'll strip you down to panties and let you jump into it! You've been a little fishy from the get-go!

:: You are an incredible big sister. Even if you are a bit bossy sometimes; I think you get that from me :(. This morning I caught you demanding, "Where is the lid? Bub! Did you take the lid?!"

:: I am proud of your 'manners'. After accusing Bub, you told him you were sorry. You also usually tell me "Thank you for the yummy dinner, Mama!" and 'please' and 'thank you' when you want something, though you sometimes need reminders.

:: You enjoy painting and playing with Play-Doh when I allow you. We don't do that often because of Riley.

:: You love to tell everyone that when you turn 5 you're going to get earrings!

:: We receive lots of 'secrets' from you about how "when it gets cold...and it can snow...we can build a snowman..?" For a little while you were telling us about Halloween and getting to dress up like a sheep and get candy, but that story has faded. Recently you did tell me you wanted to be Dora and wanted Riley to be Boots, though. Then you changed your mind to Kai Lan...